A steaming hot pile of our favorite things from around the internets. As far as we can tell, the hottest thing on the internet right now is this video of a monkey waiter in a Japanese restaurant. Enjoy! (Via Sarah) How about some fun quizzes? We've got one on super hero secret identities (and if that one's too easy for you, here's another), and one on Harry Potter spells. (Via Sarah) Joystiq recaps its coverage......

This Phillyist must admit to missing most of last night's game. Depressed and tired, with the Phillies down by two, she fell asleep early in the fourth inning, only to wake up and find the home team victorious. Hmmm... Maybe Phillyist staff sleeping = good luck for the Phillies?......

Everybody has one of those friends who's so funny, people tell him he ought to do stand-up. We have one, too: former Phillyist Neil McGarry. Only Neil, unlike most such guys, took the plunge and actually went into stand-up. And that's fun for everyone. This Friday night, Neil has put together something called The 1-4-5 Show, which is one hour's worth of entertainment from four local comedians (Carolyn Busa, Mike Eiswerth, Katie Kohler, and Neil......

A tall, icy glass of our favorite internet junk, just for you. We posted a link to an xkcd comic a while back wherein a character created a virus that would force commenters on YouTube to listen to any comments they tried to make by reading their words back to them aloud. The idea was to shame them with their own stupidity. Clever and funny—and now, reality. The developers at YouTube created an option that......

Go Phils!......

The best of the internet, squirted out in flavorful neon globules, just for you. CNN's electoral map calculator is a pretty interesting little web app. The default values show you CNN's estimate for how the race will turn out, but you can switch any state you want to either candidate and see how that swings things (via Kevin). In other election news, the Maverick family points out that John McCain is not a maverick, by......

Yom Kippur begins tonight. So even though this video isn't set in Philadelphia, there are 75,000 Jews living here (this Phillyist included), and this video goes out to them on their holiest of Holy Days.......

The shapeless dough of the internet, formed into tasty pellets and baked to perfection, just for you. It should surprise no one that Larry Flynt’s Hustler Video is making an X-rated movie inspired by Republican Vice President nominee Sarah Palin. Check out the details here. Also check out the hilariously accurate Sarah Palin Debate Flow Chart. (Via Sarah) For the first time, the Stoker estate has authorized an official sequel to Dracula. It's called Dracula:......

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The best of the internet, chopped into tiny bits and grilled for your enjoyment. Read about the winners of this year's Ig Nobel Prize, "the annual award given by the Annals of Improbable Research magazine for oddball but often surprisingly practical scientific achievements." It turns out Coca-Cola is a spermicide, and strippers make more money when ovulating. (Via Sarah) Today's bunch of political links: Colbert and Shakespearean scholar Stephen Greenblatt discuss the parallels between the......

If you made it to Saturday's rally, we'd love to hear about your experience. Leave us a note in the comments and let us know what you thought! And don't forget that the deadline to register to vote is today!......

Michael may be getting yet another casino victory soon, as SugarHouse officials are offering to tweak the casino's design plan to conform more with Michael's waterfront development plan. Michael announced that there has already been improvement in DHS following the Danieal Kelly tragedy. Well that's reassuring—we can't imagine that DHS could have gotten much worse. Michael dissolved the Minority Business Enterprise Council because it, umm, failed to help minority businesses. Oops! He's replaced it with......

A steaming hot pile of our favorite things from around the internets. Crisis averted! Royalties won't be increased, and the iTunes Music Store won't be shut down... this time! (Via Sarah) AMC is developing a series based on Red Mars, the first book in Kim Stanley Robinson's epic sci-fi trilogy about the colonization of Mars. Today's collection of ridiculous election-related links: 7-Eleven's coffee cup poll (via Zoe); Defective Yeti's liveblog of last night's Biden-Palin debate;......

Like the Action News theme. But that would be a lot less comforting if the clothes hadn't changed along with it!......

A tall, icy glass of our favorite internet junk, just for you. The iTunes Music Store could be closed soon. The Copyright Royalty Board is scheduled to hand down a decision today on royalties paid to publishers and songwriters for downloaded music, and if those rates are increased by six cents per song, Apple says it will have to shut down the iTunes Music Store because it will no longer be profitable. (Via Sarah) Nintendo......

A note to those wishing to go through somebody's wallet: you might want to make sure that there's not a surveillance system in place. And if there is, like the one at DnA Salon in Northern Liberties, you should probably check to make sure that there aren't cameras all around the surrounding area, like there are in Liberties Walk. You're just asking to get caught. More information about this video here.......

Even SEPTA.......

The shapeless dough of the internet, formed into tasty pellets and baked to perfection, just for you. Finally, a couple of really important commentators give their opinions on the presidential debates: Statler & Waldorf (via Jill)! And while we're talking about the presidential election, check out Download Squad's handy list of nonpartisan fact-checking sites. And also keep in mind that you can register to vote through Xbox Live! We're really depressed that Terminator: The Sarah......

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The best of the internet, chopped into tiny bits and grilled for your enjoyment. Japanese newspapers are reporting that a new version of the Nintendo DS will be announced soon which will include a camera and music playback. Woah. The entertainment world suffered another in what seems like a long line of painful losses this year with the death this weekend of Paul Newman. Sorry, fellas, she's taken now: Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds got......

Aren't you?......

A steaming hot pile of our favorite things from around the internets. How do you make great foods better? Combine them! Check out french fry-coated bacon on a stick and brownie chunk cookies. (Via Sarah) Jack Thompson will be permanently disbarred as of October 25, and he's also been ordered to pay monetary restitution of $43,675. Woo hoo! Of course, Thompson has filed a request seeking an emergency stay of the decision, claiming that it's......

Even the elephant at the Philadelphia Zoo is happy it's the weekend.......

Philebrity reminds us it's been 25 years since we saw Philly's favorite reporter, Jim O'Brien. The Philly Phight breaks down the Phillies Playoff possibilities. Philly Clout has the deets on Councilman Wilson Goode Jr. pulling a McCain media moment. SEPTA Watch likes the new SEPTA TV spots. This Phillyist agrees. But he still hates the bus. The Bicycle Chef takes us on a City Food Tour including two of this Phillyist's favorite food finds: DiBruno......

A tall, icy glass of our favorite internet junk, just for you. Johnny Depp has officially signed on for a fourth Pirates of the Caribbean film. It's also now official that Depp will be playing the Mad Hatter in Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland. And he'll be playing Tonto in Jerry Bruckheimer's adaptation of The Lone Ranger. Wow! We're glad to see he's keeping busy. Bruce Willis will make his directorial debut with an indie......

Sure, we'd all like to be carried up the stairs of the PMA. But if you're gonna do the Rocky run, you've gotta do it right—even if you are only a toddler.......

The best of the internet, squirted out in flavorful neon globules, just for you. Want to remix a Radiohead song? Through this coming Monday, you can go to Amazon and download a free track from Bob Dylan's upcoming release Tell Tale Signs: the Bootleg Series Vol. 8. It's probably not an entirely fair analogy, but screenwriter Todd Alcott's metaphor for the current economic crisis is definitely clever and funny. (Via) Defective Yeti predicts our political......

We're not sure if this is hilarious, offensive, hilariously offensive, or offensively hilarious. (And if the word "offensive" wasn't enough of a hint, remember to use headphones with this one, as it has some NSFW language. -Ed.)......

The most exciting thing we've ever had happen to us at Johnny Rockets was receiving a lecture on why they didn't have tomatoes ("they have salmonella") about a month after the tomatoes had all been cleared. We would have preferred the dancing.......

The best of the internet, chopped into tiny bits and grilled for your enjoyment. The Internet Memes time line is... a time line of internet memes. And it itself is now a meme! (Via Jill) Cinematical covers the important things at the Fantastic Fest: Kevin Smith, his movie, and air sex. Proto Man will be available to download as a playable character in all versions of Mega Man 9 (which comes to WiiWare today). That......