Results tagged “dallas”

The Sixers are still going (for now) as they seek to match their season-high four game winning streak (they’ve won at home against Washington 101-96, Miami 101-84, and the LA Clippers 101-80) with a win over the Dallas Mavericks tonight at 7PM at the Wach (get tickets or watch here). They will host the Memphis Grizzlies on Wednesday at 7PM at the Wach (get tickets or watch here). If you’re going to that game, get there early: they’re honoring Marc Iavaroni (member of the ’83 Championship Team) by giving away a Mr. Potato Head to the first 5,000 fans.

Donovan might be able to get some of those players he’s so desperate for—the Eagles are about to have a windfall. Well, that’s maybe stretching it a bit, but what it lacks in amount it makes up for in sweet, sweet revenge: T.O. owes us money. That’s right, the man who has loved every quarterback he’s ever played with, except when he didn’t, lost his grievance with the Eagles, who were trying to recover $1.725 million of the $2.3 million signing bonus they paid Owens when he signed a seven-year contract back in 2004. Seems the games he was suspended from during his last, painful season with us cost him $764,704 in pay, and when his lawyer didn’t respond to a letter requesting a return of the signing bonus, the Birds didn’t release his last five paychecks, which totaled $955,880. For those math whizzes out there, that means there was still an outstanding $769,120, which an arbitrator ruled last week Owens had to repay to Philadelphia. Don't feel too bad: he can take it out of his roster bonus (Jerry Jones is a sucker). The man who told reporters that "In my heart, I'm getting the last laugh" before Dallas got Tony Romo’s cute little ass handed to them by the Eagles last month apparently laughed a little too soon.

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Let’s get this out of the way early: The Eagles season is still, for all intents and purposes, OVER. To have a chance at the playoffs, they would have to win every game but one. And that is good because the game against the Patriots can already be put in the books. The team from New England is going to stomp the Eagles like Editor Jill running into a disgusting, yet otherwise harmless, cockroach. When you factor in games like the visit to clearly superior Dallas, the trip to struggling yet dangerous New Orleans, and a likely chokejob against a stiff like Miami or Buffalo, the Eagles really have no chance in hell of making the playoffs. But that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy yourself and laugh your ass off when the Birds eke out a game that they had no business winning against the self-sabotaging Washington Redskins. If that team should happen to have a nickname that is abhorrent to a whole race of people, so be it! So sit back, relax and soak in the glory of this meaningless, mid-November victory against a hopeless also-ran! It’s diary-time!

It is against my journalistic morals to report on a game that I did not watch in its entirety, so I’m not going to do a huge story on the Eagles today. I’ll keep it real: I went to bed with ten minutes left. Someone told me that a guy named Hank Baskett scored a touchdown before the game was over? Good for him. I was already in Dreamland, sickened by the prospect of watching another minute of the horrid, masturbatory exercise that the Eagles call football these days. The fact that I missed Dexter AND Curb Your Enthusiasm to watch T.O. get his dance on in the Linc end zone made me want to put a five-iron through my 56-inch plasma (Full disclosure: It’s really just a tiny thing I got at Target). But like the immortal Oran “Juice” Jones did in his classic hit “The Rain”…I chill. And put together this lovely ditty to commemorate the Eagles 38-17 suckfest loss to Tony Romo and the far superior Dallas Cowboys. Take the jump for a very beautiful poetic dedication to our boys in green.

(To the Wall Productions) (no future performances); The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (Abridged) (Marathon Theater Collective) (no future performances); The Sustainability Project (Figments, Inc.) (no future performances)

(Figments, Inc.) (No Future Showtimes)

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Performances: Debbie Does Dallas: The Musical (To The Wall Productions) (Future Showtimes)

There's a lot of reasons to hate today. Either you were alone last night or are now hung over from Valentine's Day celebrations. And everyone's cold -- mind-numbingly cold.

There are several questions that will rattle around in our heads for a while, tormenting us while seeing highlights of the remainder of the playoffs, particularly while at whatever dispirited Super Bowl party we attend, telling ourselves it's about being with friends instead of "the game." The 2.5 million dollar commercials will be funny at times, there’ll be lots of beer, some disgusting nacho dip that defies ocular sense by tasting good, and maybe it’ll actually be a good game, though we think a rematch of Super Bowl XX would only see a boring landslide victory in favor of the Pats. Yes, Brady versus Manning - with the Colts revamped D - will be the real Super Bowl.

Less than twenty-four hours after Tony Romo committed one of the most embarrassing, costly blunders in football history, not much else will be talked about after the Eagles defended Lincoln Financial Field in a 23-20 Wild Card Weekend triumph. The final 137 yards of Tiki Barber’s career—now overshadowed. Brian Westbrook’s leadership, not to mention his forty-nine-yard touchdown dash despite stomach cramps—no longer headline making. Jeff Garcia continuing to lead the Eagles to an improbable six-game winning streak—already an old story.

Dear Philadelphia:

Merry Christmas to All,

How cruel of the Eagles to win on Monday night, pulling us all back into the hunt for the playoffs like that. Why did they have to beat a Panthers team expected to win Super Bowl XLI and take their spot in the playoff ladder? Why couldn’t Jeff Garcia have just embarrassed himself and taught coach Andy Reid a lesson for not opting for A.J. Feely? Why did they have to build our hopes back up, only to disappoint us in heartbreaking fashion?

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They did it. The Eagles came, they played hard and well on defense and offense, and then, most importantly, they finished the game, winning a huge, hard-fought victory over division rivals the Dallas Cowboys. Perhaps even more satisfying, they completely defeated ex-teammate Terrell Owens, making him a non-factor in the game. The Eagles might not have been the only ones involved in removing him from the game; there might also have been some bad juju working against him, thanks to a couple of recent promotions by local radio stations, wherein piles of T.O. jerseys were burned in a gigantic bonfire, and a car with "81" spray-painted on it was attacked by fans armed with sledgehammers and other implements of destruction. But regardless of what did it, T.O.'s stats in the game speak for themselves: three catches for only 45 yards and zero touchdowns. T.O.'s main contribution to the game was whining and complaining on the sidelines. The fans treated him to some brutal "O.D." chanting, while he dropped passes, or waited for throws that never came.

You may have perhaps heard at some point this week that an NFL team known as the Dallas Cowboys is coming to town this Sunday night to play against our Philadelphia Eagles. You may also remember that said Cowboys have playing for them a fellow named Terrell Owens, who used to play for us. What does all of that mean? It means, as the AP so aptly puts it, that the T.O. circus is coming to town again. The Daily News is preparing with a brutal article full of "love" for Dallas; T.O. prepared by publishing his first children's book. We shit you not. Yeah, it was mostly ghostwritten by Courtney Parker, and the illustrations were done by Todd Harris, but it's T.O.'s name that's in big bold capital letters on the cover. The book is called Little T Learns to Share, and it's about a little boy "learning to share his new football with friends." T.O. says that for him the book is about "sharing with children the lessons he didn't learn as a child (and has had to painfully acquire as an adult)." Yeah, well, we're not so sure he's learned all those lessons quite yet. Anyway, we're hoping the Eagles can teach him one or two on Sunday night.

Yes, you read the headline right -- it was a pretty good night for Philadelphia basketball in the NBA Draft. Not as good as it could have been, but at the moment, we aren't complaining.

If horse racing is the sport of kings, then surely bowling is the sport of the working man (and woman!), which is why Phillyist was delighted to see the new Lucky Strike Lanes open up on Chestnut Street near Broad. Here, we thought, is our chance to hang out with friends, wear some smelly shoes that belong to who-knows who, drink cheap beer, eat bad nachos made with unnaturally Florescent cheese product, make the person closest to us explain again how to score a strike if someone gets it after getting a spare in the final frame, and every so often get up up to throw a heavy metal sphere down the lane only to watch it land in the gutter. Again. (Or you could try to hit the pins; we understand some people prefer that.) Ultimately - a laid back, casual night out where everyone can be themselves and not worry about their footwear or overall fashion.

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Merial, the makers of Heartguard Plus, recently conducted a survey of their 15 biggest markets, asking folks in each area how good they thought local dog-owners were about picking up after their pooches (don't worry, the respondents included both dog-owners and non-dog-owners alike, for fairness). The cities were then ranked from least to most responsible. The results are as follows:

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It's Wednesday. Hump day. Even Mother Goose couldn't give it a break. But that shouldn't stop you from good times on the internet, as our sister -ists have proven to us.

Here's what's going on with some of our -ist brethren!

Andy Reid said he wouldn't bet on Donovan McNabb being ready for Sunday's game against the New York Giants. Andy, though, is Mormon, so I don't think he'd be betting on anything. Unfortunately, none of the reporters at Tuesday's press conference raised that crucial point.

Everything seemed a little too familiar during last night's Eagles loss to the Washington Redskins. T.O., as you have undoubtedly heard by now, was suspended without pay, suspended with pay, deactivated or something before last night's game and the Eagles went to work without him. A 56-yard TD reception by Owens replacement Reggie Brown soothed Eagles fans early on, but it didn't last long. The once-dominant Eagles defense missed tackles and let the Washington Redskins have their way with them in the air. In the Before T.O. (B.T.O.) years, the Eagles used to win tight games despite their slow, spread-the-ball offense. Tonight, though, the Redskins played like the Eagles of old with timely offensive plays from various players and solid defense.