Looking back on a week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks... Nothing's really funny about this except the title. Because, really, who doesn't want to beat up someone in a suit? Something sounds... fishy. Or maybe we're just paranoid from watching too much SVU and Forensic Files. Yes, it is too bad... you could've taken pictures and posted them. This has chick flick written all over it. This one, too. This, on the other hand, has......

Looking back on a week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks... with lots of exclamation points. Llamas! Sheep! Goats! Bunnies! Holy shit, we can start a petting zoo! Gang bang auditions! But why wait? This one wants it now, now, now (not in an hour and a half)—so by the time you read this, it'll be too late. An ode to petite hipster chicks. Don't ever change (tattoos are kind of hard to remove, anyway). Busted!......

A week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks. Hey lonely hearts, it seems the spot you should've hit up this weekend, looking for love, was the George Michael concert at the Wachovia Center on Saturday. There are plenty of Missed Connections to prove it. Definitely not Dick Cheney's dream dog. Oh golly. All we've ever wanted was someone to appreciate our glaring personal contradictions. But we think that if someone asks us "to compartmentalize our neuroses......

Looking back on a week's worth of local craigslist hijinks. We're not sure what's more alarming: the pet rock running away or the five bottles of whiskey. Actually, we suspect the events listed may be out of sequence. This isn't usually what they have in mind when they say friends with benefits. But hey, if this works, we're looking for a friend with a beach house. Time to grab the scissors and clip coupons, kiddies.......

A week's worth of local Craigslist highjinks. Living in the burbs isn't the best idea when you want to meet fellow metalheads and rockers, as this guy is discovering. Stock up on some smokes and shred some guitars and give him a call. Of course anything can be a fetish, but diapers? Really? Hopefully this man isn't the only one out there needing some pampering of the "true and sincere" variety. Service workers, commence eyelash......

A week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks. How's this for a Paris to Philly housing swap? You provide one beautiful apartment near the Eiffel Tower and your BMW and I give you my crumbling West Philly twin and a Septa pass. Should that not work out, maybe I'll hit up this guy for his offer of free rent in exchange for deep friendship. The kind of friendship that is so consuming you are not allowed......

A week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks. A man trades his son's car for a BJ and then asks Craigslist readers if he's a bad person. Readers, weigh in. We personally feel somewhat sorry for the schmuck. If you scan the internet enough, you realize love and sex are pretty terrifying to most people, even when they are at their most forward. That in mind, can a nice seaman please give this girl some attention?......

A week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks... If you're going to use big words, at least use them correctly. And if your headline includes the word copulate, that's a good indication your posting should be somewhere other than the strictly platonic section. Are you pretentious and elitist enough to hang with this person? Also, do people actually still use the word yuppie? It's a sign! Or somebody accidentally dropped a Leonard Cohen tape. We think......

A week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks... Among the many strange elements of this post, we are most confused by what kind of person seeks medical attention in the missed connections section. Also, why does her husband want to watch? You know there's someone in your office you want to nominate for this. We suggest you avoid recommending your boss, however, unless you are really looking to collect some unemployment checks and head to the......

Looking back on a week's worth of local craigslist hijinks... We're not sure why this was in the "strictly platonic" section, but if the weather last weekend wasn't enough to make you a hot, sticky mess, this guy will. You can always count on a murderer for a fancy prose style. Or a botanist. We can only imagine the response if this was posted in the pets section. But is she housebroken? It puts the......

A week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks. We have to advise this guy to learn from Larry Craig and avoid public bathrooms. Otherwise, bon voyage! In lean economic times, if you can't find a job, offer your naked body for anatomical study. Really, folks, it's for the good of the children. What is the proper response when one gets flashed? Either this is the most caring husband ever, or he really wants his wife to......

A week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks. A battle is brewing over a lost (or stolen?) cat in Mayfair. Watch out—the claws are out. And speaking of cats, this Mr. Bigglesworth-esque feline is looking for a new home. If you've been looking for something to stroke while plotting world domination, here's your chance. A non-skinny jeans wearing, anti-PBR guy threw caution to the wind in his quest to hook up with the hipster girl of......

Looking back on a week's worth of local craigslist hijinks... Fashion-conscious hipster-lover reaches out to a foxy girl in a grandma sweater he peeped on Wednesday in Old City. We are relieved to infer the attraction does not extend to his own grandma. To the girl who assures us she is not creepy, just cheap—tell us if your scheme works because we think paying rent is bullshit too. But if it doesn't work, we're sure......

Looking back on a week's worth of local craigslist hijinks... Rather than nabbing his (or her?) prey the old fashioned way, one wannabe kidnapper is advertising on craigslist instead. A poster in Aston has an adult cake pan for sale but declined to post pictures, offering instead to email photos to interested parties. Wow—who knew cake pans could be too titillating for craigslist? The enterprising driver of an obscenely bright car is attempting to sell......

Looking back on a week's worth of local craigslist hijinks... True love is hard to find, but this man's free car comes complete with a history of all the trials and tribulations of love... and maybe even a few stains! (Thanks, Eric!) This 'lister gives a whole new meaning to getting hit on! Although he seems to have a noble cause, this Yardley resident should know that you can't even give Furbies away anymore. Here's......

Looking back on a week's worth of local craigslist hijinks... This poster may not be very perceptive... "Bored moms" don't usually like to offer themselves up for "adult" photo shoots. Remember last week's headless deer? It's, oddly, still available. Place your bids before it's too late! Another treasure from the craigslist trove is this wonderful elephant foot/giant beer mug. Attention: MySpace/Facebook experts (everyone ages 15-30?)! Someone has a use for your useless skills! And your......

A look back on a week's worth of local craigslist hijinks... Attention: Happily Married Father of 1, you have a crazed stalker/potential babysitter. Let us know how that's working out for you. For that person with 500 nose piercings, have we got a deal for you! Remember Barron? Well, it seems that the search is over, no thanks to some Ranters and Ravers whose comical antics made for a rousing week on the Craigslist front,......

Looking back on a week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks. The question of the week has still gone unanswered: Do hot punk guys want to make out with fat chicks? Why anyone would have any use for a wax person is beyond us. They seem pretty lazy. Is it considered selling out if you try to hock your own British accent on Craigslist? This guy (with the help of his mom) has what you need......

Looking back on a week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks. Someone please take this guy's shit and give him a car. He must really need one to be offering up his nerdhood like that. A South Philly man was (and still is!) taking bids on his nerdhood... err, uh, sweet Death Star Painting. ...While another, ahem, "man" (who will NEVER be confused with Cat Stevens), begins the hunt for a "sexy time specialist" Sexy time......