Looking back on a week's worth of local Craigslist hijinks... with lots of exclamation points. Llamas! Sheep! Goats! Bunnies! Holy shit, we can start a petting zoo! Gang bang auditions! But why wait? This one wants it now, now, now (not in an hour and a half)—so by the time you read this, it'll be too late. An ode to petite hipster chicks. Don't ever change (tattoos are kind of hard to remove, anyway). Busted!... [continue]

The shapeless dough of the internet, formed into tasty pellets and baked to perfection, just for you. Create your own comic strip, with no artistic ability required. Sense of humor, however, is not optional. Geekadelphia left us salivating over what just might be the coolest table ever. And ShinyShiny found the lamps to go with it. How walkable is your neighborhood? Find out using Walk Score. This Phillyist's lair scored a 94/100. Sweet. But it... [continue]

The best of the internet, squirted out in flavorful neon globules, just for you. We're really hoping Christian Bale didn't actually beat up his mom and his sister, because then we'd have to be really disappointed in him. Batman does not beat up old ladies! Unless they're super villains, of course (via Ross). Meanwhile, Warren Ellis points out that Hollywood stars used to be capable of more impressive bad behavior. Check out Cinematical's Comic-Con preview.... [continue]

But wouldn't it be nice if once—just once—we came across a tourist video that used no music from the Rocky movies?... [continue]

This week's quote comes from Sarah Bernhardt, who said: "For the theatre one needs long arms... an artiste with short arms can never make a fine gesture." Now, on with the listings! As You Like It - Medium rare, with extra bacon. July 30-August 3. Free. Lingering - Do you have to? Do you have to? August 3 - 24. Tickets online. Shakespeare's R&J - It's not the way you know it. August 1-23. Tickets... [continue]

Fun around town, for $10 or less: Klezmer!: Klingon Klezmer in a free concert sponsored by the Chestnut Hill Community Association at Pastorius Park (Abington and Lincoln Drive), 7:30PM. Free Cheap Laughs: General admission to comic Tammy Pescatelli's show at Helium (2031 Sansom), 8PM. $10 Quizzo Mania: Get your Quizzo on at 12 Steps Down (831 Christian), 9PM; The Black Sheep (247 S. 17th), 8PM; Dirty Frank’s (13th and Pine), 9PM; Dr. Watson's (216 S.... [continue]

South Philadelphia is a unique collection of narrow streets, old-world traditions and curse words. Hidden amongst the proud blue-collar glaze of cheese-whiz and Catholicism lies a number of fascinating mysteries, mysteries that have never penetrated the protective border of Washington Avenue. Until now. Until one Phillyist* decided to pull back the curtain of intrigue and reveal…The Mysteries of South Philadelphia. Mystery #1: The Fountain of Youth. Right around the corner of 12th and Tasker... [continue]

Some updates on local criminal cases: the Bucks County mother accused of turning a sleepover into a sex party was ordered to stand trial yesterday. Andy Reid's son Garrett Reid was sentenced to two years in a relatively new state corrections program that combines incarceration and intensive drug treatment. Mumia Abu-Jamal lost his latest appeal for a new trial on Monday. Perhaps not surprisingly, the DRPA got an earful from angry commuters yesterday at... [continue]

...because seriously, whatever brand they're using in their microphones right now sucks. But we'll get to that eventually, because we weren't at the TLA last Tuesday night just to see Alkaline Trio (MySpace). We were also there to see the opening act, The Fashion (MySpace). We were more or less completely psyched for this show, because we've become pretty big Alkaline Trio fans over the course of the last year, and we were pleasantly surprised... [continue]

Don't forget, PAWS is looking for volunteers who can foster kittens and mom-cats during this kitten season! Kitten season has hit the PAWS shelter especially hard this year, and the shelter is completely full, with more animals coming in every day. The devastating upshot of this is that perfectly healthy, adoptable pets are being put down for no reason other than that there isn't enough space in the shelter for them. Remember, adopting a shelter... [continue]

Poor Philly. We've been named the city with the most unattractive people, the fattest, and the most miserable. But, finally we've caught a break. Walkscore.com—an online tool to help people find great neighborhoods to live in—named Philadelphia the fifth most walkable city in the country. San Francisco was number one on the list, with New York and Boston coming in second and third, respectively. Although, one has to wonder how San Francisco is so walkable... [continue]

Golden Girl, Estelle Getty, died today of Lewy Body Dementia, a progressive brain disease. She was 84. She would have been 85 on Friday and 86 a year from then. Her longtime caregiver Paul Chapdelaine wrote on her website: Estelle, we love you and will miss you dearly. We pray that you are met at the Pearly Gate with open arms and a warm welcome by all who have passed before you. If there's a... [continue]

A few months ago, we asked readers to tell us where we can eat cheaply and quickly in Old City. We got some great feedback (this Phillyist eats at Gianfranco Pizza Rustica at least once a week, much to the chagrin of her personal trainer), and now we'd like to add another spot to the list: Independence Al Fresco, next to the Independence Visitor Center. Now, we're not endorsing the spot, mostly because we... [continue]

Looking back on a week's worth of local craigslist hijinks. We're not sure what's more alarming: the pet rock running away or the five bottles of whiskey. Actually, we suspect the events listed may be out of sequence. This isn't usually what they have in mind when they say friends with benefits. But hey, if this works, we're looking for a friend with a beach house. Time to grab the scissors and clip coupons, kiddies.... [continue]

Remember that advertising campaign that used to say that Philadelphia is more fun for tourists when they stay over? Unfortunately, a couple tourists from Missouri recently found out when Philadelphia isn’t so much fun. Namely when you get plowed over by a drunken South Philly douchebag when you are just trying to cross the street to see your hometown St. Louis Cardinals play the Phillies. One of the tourists, 53-year-old Cindy Grassi, died from her... [continue]

Dear Miami Café: For weeks, my roommate’s girlfriend has been salivating over your free salsa lessons allegedly given on Fridays. This Friday, my girlfriend and I were prepared to attend the dancing and drinking at Miami Café along with them and a few other friends. We walked to 4th and South Streets, ready for dancing and learning. We were told dancing would not be happening for at least “another hour or so” as many patrons... [continue]

We bring you the buzz in the 215 blogs this week. Philebrity wondered about the govenrnment's plan to put speed bump decals around town. Fake speed bumps? People don't even slow down for the real ones. Next thing you know, they'll be putting paintings of cops in high-crime areas. A List Of Things Thrown Five Minutes Ago has a summer cocktail series going on. Summer and cocktails: two things we love. Cheers! Philly Burbs was... [continue]

Less Than Jake saxophonist JR... [continue]

It's time for your weekly dose of kitty cuteness, courtesy of our friends at Philadelphia Animal Welfare Society (PAWS). We're still in the midst of kitten season, which means the shelter is absolutely bursting with adoptable felines. With that in mind, meet this week's PAWS Cat of the Week: Every kitten and mom-cat in need of fostering! People have been surrendering orphaned kittens and mom-cats with litters like crazy recently, and the shelter is absolutely... [continue]

The perfect pair of shoes can make your day, while a bad pair can make your day hell. Shoes can complete your outfit, make your rear end look great and your legs a mile long, help you cross the finish line in a marathon, show off the first pedicure of spring, keep your toes from getting squished in the mosh pit and so much more. Whether your favorite pair happens to be dirty sneakers... [continue]