Phillyist Monthly Favorites

Countdown to 2009: Jim's Top 10 Most Anticipated Movies of 2009

Every weekday of December (except for December 25, that is), Phillyist will be counting down to 2009 with our highlights from the past year and our predictions for the next. If you have a list you'd like to submit, let us know!

10. Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs was one of my favorite books as a kid. It takes a simple but fantastic premise (what if it started raining food?) and plays with it in wonderful ways, with many beautiful illustrations. Now the book is getting adapted into an animated movie, with voice acting provided by James Caan, Bruce Campbell, Andy Samberg, Tracy Morgan, and even Mr. T! The only thing I'm worried about is how they're going to pad such a simple story into something big enough and complex enough to fill up a full-length movie, but hopefully they won't screw it up.

9. The Wolf Man
Director Joe Johnston and a pretty impressive cast that includes Anthony Hopkins, Benicio Del Toro, Hugo Weaving, and Emily Blunt are getting together to remake Universal's classic 1941 film, which starred Lon Chaney Jr. as a man cursed to transform into a werewolf. The original Wolf Man is actually one of the lesser of the Universal monster movies, thanks in part to the fact that Lon Chaney's Larry Talbot is weak, whiny, and weird. Del Toro is frankly a far more accomplished actor, and he's backed up by plenty of other great talent here, so I'm expecting a remake that's actually better than the original for once.

8. X-Men Origins: Wolverine
Wolverine is almost certainly the most popular character in the X-Men franchise, so it's not at all surprising that he would get his own spin-off movie. It's still exciting, though, especially considering that Hugh Jackman is reprising his role as everybody's favorite beast-like Canadian mutant. The IMDB cast list promises appearances by plenty of other mutants and humans whose names are familiar to comic book geeks, and the story will apparently delve into Wolverine's secret past. Should be fun!

7. Where the Wild Things Are
Another great children's book being turned into a movie is Maurice Sendak's classic work Where the Wild Things Are, which is being adapted into a live-action film by visionary director Spike Jonze. This one was getting some bad buzz earlier this year, but it sounds like Jonze and the studio have settled their disagreements, and now I just have a really good feeling about the movie. Forest Whitaker, James Gandolfini, Catherine O'Hara, Catherine Keener, Paul Dano, and Tom Noonan all either appear in the film, or provide their voices. With these talented folks involved, and Jonze calling the shots, I think we're going to end up with a really beautiful, surreal, unique film that might just be a modern classic.

6. The Fantastic Mr. Fox
Wes Anderson is an amazing and unique talent, and his next movie would probably have ended up on this list no matter what it was about, but the fact that it's an animated adaptation of a Roald Dahl novel with George Clooney, Cate Blanchett, Bill Murray, Jason Schwartzman, and Anjelica Huston in the cast makes it totally irresistible.

5. Nottingham
Director Ridley Scott takes on the legend of Robin Hood, recasting it as a love triangle among Robin, Maid Marian, and the Sherriff of Nottingham. The really interesting bit is that both Robin and the Sherriff are being played by the same man: Russell Crowe. Sienna Miller will take on the role of Marian. I've always been a fan of the Robin Hood story, some of Ridley Scott's films are my favorites of all time, and I'm really fascinated by the gimmick they're using with Crowe playing two roles, so I definitely want to check this one out.

4. Sherlock Holmes
Another legendary fictional character getting the movie treatment next year is Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's brilliant detective. The man in the director's chair this time is Guy Ritchie, whose work has been uneven, but whose good stuff is really good. The mighty Robert Downey Jr. will take on the role of Holmes, with Rachel McAdams as his love interest (Irene Adler), and Jude Law as the erstwhile Dr. Watson. I love that cast, and it's been too long since I've seen a good Sherlock Holmes film, so I'm primed and ready for this one.

3. Public Enemies
The title of this film is so bland and boring, and so similar to the titles of so many other films, I always assume it's some movie I don't want to see. But then I realize it's that movie about crime in 1930s America, directed by Michael Mann, starring Johnny Depp as John Dillinger, Christian Bale, Billy Crudup as J. Edgar Hoover, Giovanni Ribisi, Stephen Dorff, Lili Taylor, Channing Tatum, and Leelee Sobieski. And that movie sounds awesome!

2. Terminator Salvation
I'm not all that pleased that McG of Charlie's Angels infamy is directing this movie, but there hasn't been a Terminator movie yet that I haven't loved (yes, even 3), and that's not to mention the fantastic TV series that has been keeping my love of killing machines from the future alive since the last film came out. Plus, Salvation stars the incredibly talented Christian Bale as John Connor, with Helena Bonham Carter and Michael Ironside backing him up. I have high hopes.

1. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
This one made last year's list, because it was going to come out in 2008... until the lame studio execs decided they needed a tentpole release for summer of 2009. Bastards! Anyway, when it finally does hit screens, I'll be there front and center, because... well, because I'm a Harry Potter fan, and therefore have no choice. But even if I did have a choice I'd be looking forward to this one. It's an exciting fantasy adventure with magic, action, and comedy, and it's the latest entry in a pretty impressive series of films, each of which has been better than the last, thanks in part to the fact that its cast of actors has been growing up and getting more talented as the series has progressed. And fans of the books know this film should be particularly dark and dramatic.

Image via Internet Movie Poster Awards Gallery

Countdown to 2009: Top Ten Rejected Names for Adolf Hitler Campbell (aka Get Thee to a Foster Home)

Surely by now you have all read (perhaps on this very site?) the story about the Campbell family in Holland Township, who gave their kids such pleasant (and oddly verbose) monikers as JoyceLynn Aryan Nation and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie. Oh wait, you don’t read stories about filthy hatemongers who stain their children by giving them names that reflect their own sickly perverted worldview? OK. Well anyway, evidently they got angry when a ShopRite near their (ahem) bunker refused to personalize a birthday cake for their oldest spawn, Adolf Hitler Campbell. Personally, I did not come here to criticize this supermarket for not agreeing that the customer is always right, or to air my view that these mullet-rocking Nazi freakazoids should be drawn and quartered in the public common. No, I am simply here to reveal a document that was provided to me in the greatest of secrecy by the completely fictional Pennsylvania Department of Baby Naming. So here it is, the Top Ten Rejected Names for Adolf Hitler Campbell:

10. Osama bin Ambulance Chaser Campbell
9. Dahmer Amin Stalin Telemarketer Campbell
8. Torquemada Hussein Waterboarder Campbell
7. Progresso Chunky Minestrone Campbell (They enjoy soup; who knew?)
6. Oswald Sirhan Booth Insurance Company Campbell
5. Rove Cheney Bush Limbaugh Campbell
4. Stained For Life Future Juvenile Delinquent Campbell
3. Save Time And Arrest Me Now Campbell
2. Better Not Get Pulled Over By Any Jewish Cops Campbell

And the Number One Rejected Name for Adolf Hitler Campbell:

1. Terrell Owens Campbell

Image courtesy of flickr user vagawi.

Sparky and Snarky

Dear Sparky and Snarky,
After a happy hour where everyone got a little too happy, I had a drunken threesome with a girl I'm dating and one of my friends. Now the two of them seem kind of into each other. Things hadn't gotten serious between her and I yet, so it's not like we're exclusive or anything—what should I do?
-Three's a Crowd

Dear TaC,
Get over it. Seriously. If you liked the girl that much, you wouldn't have suggested she sleep with your friend. And don't blame it on the bottle, either. I bet your willingness to share—and the fact that you seem more confused than upset by this—means you've got other stuff going on with other ladies. Am I right? Oh, wait... you can't talk back. Anyway, I suggest you walk away from the situation and let them sort out their feelings (or lack thereof) for themselves. If they end up together, you'll get the credit for hooking them up during a champagne toast at some future wedding. If they don't, you can always try to coerce one of them into a threesome with someone else. Just make sure it's not someone you actually like.
xo, Snarky

Ouch, Snarky. Down, tiger, down...
TaC, when you realize that you feel hurt about this (because some part of you does), understand that that's almost certainly your pride talking and not your affection for the grrl; no one wants to come in second. Snarky does have a point that you probably aren't that into the grrl. Whether you decide that we're wrong and you do want this grrl, or you decide to entirely avoid the drama which is brewing, the means to the end is the same. Walk away. If you think you might still like her, leave it open-ended so she can approach you (people give chase as you pull away, after all); if you don't want her, or you think your friend does and you want things to remain cool with that friend, then walk away and be firm but very gracious about it. That'll make the wedding toast less awkward.
Sparky!

Got questions about sex, dating, or relationships? Then we've got answers, whether you like them or not. Send your short but informative queries, complete with clever signatures, to sparkyandsnarky@phillyist.com and wait for the magic to happen.

Bomb on El Tracks?

(Link changed, post altered slightly. Thanks, phillybits.)

Phillyist just heard that SEPTA's Market-Frankford El is not running between 40th Street and 52nd Street due to reports of a bomb on the tracks. The SEPTA website doesn't mention any bomb threats, but does say shuttle buses are being used between 40th and 52nd due to "police activity." Maybe it's connected to this police negotiation with a gunman that's going on at 46th and Market? We'll let you know when we find out more.

UPDATE: The situation with the gunman is now over. Negotiators tried to persuade him to surrender, but a little after noon he shot himself in the head. He was transported to the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania and pronounced dead shortly thereafter.

Free $5 Starbucks Gift Cards

If you see a Zipcar that has a Starbucks cup on its roof, don't be an asshole; tell the driver about it. For being a good samaritan, you will receive a $5 Starbucks gift card from the Zipcar's driver. We've seen this over the past two days, but there's no telling how long (or short) it will last. Karma does exist and it does pay to be nice.

Winter Meeting Roundup: So Long, Mr. Burrell

The World Champion Philadelphia Phillies (that’s STILL fun to say) made some pretty significant moves at last week’s MLB Winter Meetings in Las Vegas. Here’s some of the items that rookie GM Ruben Amaro Jr. got done:

Raul Ibanez will patrol left field next year for the Phillies. He signed a 3-year $31.5 million dollar contract last week. A former Mariners mainstay, the 36-year-old Ibanez hit .293 last year with 23 homers and 110 RBIs. The only concern is that the heart of the Phillies' order now is entirely left-handed.
The Ibanez signing effectively ends the Pat Burrell Era in Philly, which is bittersweet to say the very least. Burrell understood our city better than almost any Philly athlete ever, endured more than most, produced infrequently, but came through when it mattered most to cap off his ten years here. Let's always remember him for leading the victory parade and not for the ass-out Pat Burrell strikeout dance.
In a feel-good story, the Phils re-signed pitcher Jamie Moyer to a two-year deal which would suggest he'll finish his career with his hometown team, unless he pitches into his 90s which he may well do. This is a guy who started his career before Cole Hamels was even born AND led the Phillies in wins last year. He also does a lot to coach the younger pitchers and it's always fun to have a hometown guy on a team he loves being on. Welcome back, Jamie.
The Phillies signed RHP Chan Ho Park to a one-year deal. There seems to be some disagreement over what his role should be as he sees himself as a starter and Amaro seems, anyway, to view him as significant bullpen help. It will be almost as interesting to watch how this plays out as it will to see how long it takes people to start making "Ho Park" strip club jokes. That's professional sports in 2008, fun for the whole family!

And finally, speaking of which...

The end of the Pat Burrell Era also means the end to the urban legend tales we've all heard about the man. You know the ones, the 4th hand accounts of things or deeds done or said by Pat Burrell in some kind of party atmosphere that no normal person could get away with. To pay tribute to the man, I will share my favorite which came from a friend of a friend of a friend (who swears it to be true) that she had a tawdry one-night stand with Mr. Burrell, presumably at some point before his nuptials. Anyway, as the tale goes, in the middle of the action, Pat stops, looks into her eyes, and says, "Can you believe it?"

"Believe what?" she replies.

"Can you believe you're f*@%ing Pat Burrell?"

Needless to say, we're going to miss Pat the Bat.

Image Credit: Flickr user phillymads63

Week Around the Ists

Image by Lauri Apple/Chicagoist

Chicagoist was in such a tizzy over the arrest of their Governor, Rod Blagojevich, - looking at the federal complaint, examining fellow arrestee John Harris, enjoying artists' interpretations, and comparing him to a Lego man - that they almost didn't notice that Mayor Daley wasn't bothering to have the streets plowed.
Seattlest had visions of monkey smugglers and frozen custard dancing in their heads, and lots of shopping locally left to do before the holidays.
Shanghaiist was surprised to hear that the US may not have a pavilion at the Shanghai World Expo in 2010.
Bostonist explored the dirty side of the holidays, catching a burlesque show called The Slutcracker and watching the annual Santa Speedo Run.
LAist snapped up shots at the UCLA Undie Run, a semi-annual event featuring drunk college students wearing next to nothing.
DCist noted this year's stinky Ginkgo fruit epidemic in Washington, and pondered whether they smell more like vomit, dog poo, or uhhh, something else.
Torontoist got all meta and announced that the site would be shutting down at the end of the month, but not before doing many, many awesome and amazing things.
Austinist explained why it isn't worth the effort to get angry over homophobic rapper Trick Trick, and was surprised that a local school teacher threw a fit when a student tried to hand out free copies of Linux in class.
Londonist watched an ingeniously condensed record of a walk across the entire breadth of the city and its suburbs, which was almost enough to build up sufficiently large appetite to conquer an epic Christmas sandwich.
Gothamist visited Sesame Street and brought back a special message from Elmo.
SFist saw so many choice companies negatively affected by the recession, so they asked readers which businesses they would like to see collapse in 2009.

Whiz of the Web: Tuesday Torpedoes

The shapeless dough of the internet, formed into tasty pellets and baked to perfection, just for you.

As we all know, everything is better with bacon. And now you can add bacon to all your favorite websites! Try Phillyist with bacon! It's crunchy and salty and tasty and Philly. (Via Stephanie)

More year-end lists! Wired picks the top 10 games and gadgets of 2008. Meanwhile, Shiny Shiny also picked the best gadgets of 2008.

Check out a hilarious tour of PS3's Home, courtesy The Slackerz.

A blogger wonderfully illustrates an awesome dream he had about being one of a team of Batmen sent to stop Darth Vader from turning people into zombies at the mall. (Via)

Do you love Optimus Prime, but always figured you'd love him more if he was a hot chick? Well, first of all, you're sick. And second of all, here you go. (Via)

Super Punch presents more Christmas and Hanukkah links.

I Can Has Cheezburger wishes you a happy holiday the only way they know how: with a video of painfully cute kitties doing painfully cute things, accompanied by poorly spelled captions. Enjoy!

Dude Twittered his plane crash.

This is pretty great: a YouTube user has applied old MST3K gags to a modern commercial.

Wired's latest how-to wiki finally teaches us how to do something important: how to fold an origami Millenium Falcon!

Wired presents a gallery of 10 outrageous gifts for gearheads, and a list of 10 cool cars.

Another list from Wired: 8 signs that Apple customers are no longer special.

The Linux Foundation is asking Linux users to submit videos demonstrating the "I'm Linux" theme, to counter the popular "I'm a PC" and "I'm a Mac" ads. The creator of the best video will win a free trip to Tokyo to participate in the Linux Foundation Japan Linux Symposium next October. (Via)

Cinematical selects seven cult and campy holiday movies.

MTV finally sat down David Fincher and got him to explain what in hell's name is the deal with him making a chef comedy starring Keanu Reeves. Nope, we still don't get it.

A YouTube user has thrown together an amusing trailer for a live-action Thundercats movie, using clips from other films which have been altered in sometimes pretty impressive ways.

A poster for Land of the Lost has hit the web.

Windows XP has had its life extended again. Microsoft had planned to tell computer makers to stop preloading the software on new notebook and desktop systems on January 31, 2009, but now computer makers are allowed to continue shipping machines with Windows XP through 2009.

Google has added the ability to search by a particular style or type of image to its already pretty handy image search feature.

A super-geeky Christmas tree.

Santa is upgrading his tech. Now you can chat with him online.

Sci Fi Wire looks at six sci-fi shows that are on the ratings ropes and analyzes their chances of being back next season.

J.J. Abrams posted an update on the progress of Star Trek to the movie's Facebook page; he says the film is getting some final tweaks, but should be totally locked next week.

It's nice that they're having a charity auction of autographed posters and memorabilia from The Spirit. But all those who purchase the items should do so for charity purposes only—and then maybe burn them all in a bonfire. Also for charity! And speaking of The Spirit, the Movie Blog takes a close look at the desperate, sad, and misleading marketing for the film.

Download some 8-bit Christmas music for free! And while we're talking free downloads, here's one of a video wherein American comedy luminaries talk about the influence of Monty Python.

A vaguely amusing video of Darth Vader getting the shoe treatment during a press conference.

More downloadable Mega Man titles could be on the way.

The theme of Wii Fanboy's latest top 5 is Christmastime in gaming.

Super Punch continues to post about the interesting marketing for Coraline.

You can download Credit Crunch, the board game, from The Economist website. (Via)

Cute little Planet of the Apes figures. That's just creepy.

From the priceless headlines department: "Mice suspected in deadly cat fire." They're getting their revenge! (Via)

Sounds like the "open world" in No More Heroes 2 might be a little more open than it was in No More Heroes.

Microsoft just might be planning to make it possible for the Zune and the Xbox to interface with each other.

GameDaily has a two-part persons of the year list. (Via)

Game designer Warren Spector is apparently working an epic Mickey Mouse project with folks from Disney Feature Animation and Pixar.

New screenshots from Batman: Arkham Asylum.

The match-up you were all waiting for: Mario vs. Spartan.

How about a Chanel handbag made out of beef jerky? Mmm mmm! (Via Jill)

Photo of a bacon pie shell by Flickr user spitecho

Countdown to 2009: Jim's Top 10 Best Comic Book Miniseries and One-shots of 2008

10. Aetheric Mechanics
A "graphic novella" by Warren Ellis that's a mind-bending mash-up of Sherlock Holmes and steampunk. It's an amazing universe that hopefully Ellis will take us back to again at some point in the near future.

9. Wolverine: Manifest Destiny
This miniseries has only just started, but it's essentially Wolverine fighting an insane re-imagining of the cast of every kung fu movie ever. Sort of Wolverine vs. The Big Trouble in Little China. In other words, it's pure awesome.

8. Justice League: The New Frontier Special
Darwyn Cooke's New Frontier was already one of the greatest comic book miniseries of all time, but with this one-shot tie-in to the recent animated film adaptation, Cooke made it even better by tacking on assorted extra stories that further help bridge the gap between the Golden Age DC Universe and the Silver Age DC Universe. Beautiful, funny, and brilliant.

7. Umbrella Academy: Dallas
The first Umbrella Academy miniseries, which finished up early this year, was one of the best surprises in comic books in recent memory, and this second miniseries, though it's only just started, is already looking nearly as excellent. Everybody's favorite group of super-powered children are picking up the pieces after a near-apocalypse, and a violent new mystery has just begun.

6. Ultimate Human
Warren Ellis returns to Marvel's Ultimate universe to pit the Hulk against Iron Man, and then introduce a new villain that they both have to fight together. Tortured freaks, epic action, and hilarity. Thank you, Mr. Ellis!

5. Hellboy: The Crooked Man
A new Hellboy series is always a must-buy, but this was a particular interesting one, with really unique art by Richard Corben, and a hillbilly horror story about witches, the devil, and a man haunted by bad decisions in his past. Hellboy is only a supporting character, but that doesn't make the comic any less excellent.

4. Comic Book Comics
The history of comic books is about as fantastic and incredible as your average comic book, so what better way to tell that story than in a comic book? That's the concept behind Comic Book Comics, and the result is an extremely informative, absolutely riveting series that you can't help but love.

3. The Age of the Sentry
This is a relatively new miniseries, but it's already one of my favorites. Each issue contains multiple stories, all pretending to be rediscovered Silver Age tales about Marvel's God-like hero, the Sentry. It's all the fun of old school comics, but with a self-aware sense of humor, and without the corny melodrama. Perfection!

2. Dan Dare
This Garth Ennis miniseries, which brought England's classic space hero back to life, was the last great thing to come out of Virgin Comics before it went belly up. It's a smart, exciting, deeply moving, and deeply British sci-fi epic.

1. X-Men: Magneto - Testament
Author Greg Pak brings us the definitive origin story for Marvel's magnetic-powered mutant anti-hero. But it's not the tale you might expect. Mutant powers are barely mentioned. Instead, this is the story of a boy and his family trying desperately to survive the Holocaust. If you don't think comic books can be an emotionally powerful art form, read this, and prepare to be amazed. Unquestionably the best and most important book on the stands right now.

Image by Marvel Comics, via The Adventures of a Struggling Comic Book Writer

Countdown to 2009: Jim's Top 10 Least Anticipated Movies of 2009

10. The Uninvited
This is a remake, but not of, as one might reasonably expect, any of the many other films called The Uninvited. Instead, it's a remake of a South Korean film from 2003 called A Tale of Two Sisters. I saw that film at the Philadelphia Film Festival and didn't really enjoy it. It's definitely effective and disturbing, with many genuinely scary moments, but overall it just doesn't make a lot of sense, and leaves a lot of questions unanswered. And seeing as how I didn't like the original, the American remake can only be worse. So far the ads bear this out; it seems pretty clear from the trailer that they've removed everything unique and interesting from the original and turned it into a by-the-numbers supernatural thriller. "Uninvited," indeed.

9. He's Just Not That Into You
This one was originally scheduled to be released in 2008, so it got a spot on last year's version of this list. Now that it appears to actually be coming out early next year, it makes the list again. To quote myself from last time: "A movie adaptation of a lame relationship advice book?! Which is made up of interconnecting story arcs?!? HATE!!!"

8. The Pink Panther 2
I don't even like the original Pink Panther films (I don't find Clouseau's bumbling funny; I just end up sympathizing painfully with his boss' desire to kill him), and Steve Martin's remake looked even worse, and now they're making a sequel to that. No thank you.

7. 17 Again
Many films have answered the question "What if you could be young again?" but for some reason this film thought it necessary to answer that question yet again, and in pretty much the same way as all the others. This time the performers acting out the ancient farce are teen sensation-of-the-moment Zac Efron as the young self, and Friends has-been Matthew Perry as the old self. I think I'd rather eat a fork than see this movie.

6. Wild Child
Another repeat offender! This film was also scheduled to be released in 2008, and made my list of the Top 10 Least Anticipated Movies for that year, but it won't actually come out in America until around the middle of next year. The last time I wrote about this film, there wasn't much information available on it, but now you can read a detailed synopsis at ComingSoon.net. And guess what? It still sounds terrible! Spoiled rich girl is sent to stuck-up British academy and learns an important lesson from the other girls there, but also teaches them an important lesson. Yak.

5. Angels & Demons
Let's get this out of the way right now: Dan Brown is a terrible writer. I couldn't even get past the first couple chapters of The Da Vinci Code, it was so awful. Also pretty terrible writers? Akiva Goldsman and David Koepp. Brown wrote the book this movie is based on, and Goldsman and Koepp wrote the adaptation. It's three layers of bad!

4. Saw VI
I thought they milked the premise dry in the first film, but incredibly they've made five more without really altering the formula one bit. Make it stop!!

3. A Christmas Carol
Don't get me wrong. I love the story, and a number of the film adaptations are some of my favorite movies. But this version, if I understand correctly, will use the same creepy, uncanny-valley-style animation process director Robert Zemeckis used for Polar Express and Beowulf, and it will star Jim Carrey as Ebenezer Scrooge, the Ghost of Christmas Past, the Ghost of Christmas Present, and the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come. I'm pretty sure this movie is already playing nonstop in hell.

2. The Three Stooges
I used to like The Three Stooges... when I was a kid. Now it seems painfully stupid and dull. The Farrelly brothers, whose work I've never enjoyed (well, except maybe Fever Pitch; that was pretty cute), apparently never grew out of liking the Stooges and are making the show into a movie. I'm horrified. If they're planning on casting Jim Carrey as every one of the Stooges, the production should be stopped immediately for the good of humanity.

1. Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakuel
Again, I was not a fan of the original Alvin and friends, and even less of a fan of the new, computer-animated, rapping versions. I was ready to declare the death of Western Civilization when the first movie starring these horrid creatures did so well at the box office. And now, here I am, staring down the "squeakuel." *shiver*

Image via Internet Movie Poster Awards Gallery

Foodsday Tuesday: Return of the Mac

I read the Northern Liberties community message board a lot, and post on it with relative frequency. It's always nice to know what's going on in my neighborhood, even when the news posted is, well, less-than-nice.

Yesterday, I saw a posting that made my heart go pitter patter. The Swallow Bistro, a five minute walk from my humble abode, has completely changed its menu: it is now an all mac'n'cheese restaurant. Choose your own combo or go with one of theirs, but no matter how elaborate, the fact remains that you're eating pasta and melted cheese. I may have died and gone to heaven.

Not everyone in the community, though, was as excited as I at this news. Instantly, Swallow's motives and sound-mindedness were questioned: why launch an all mac'n'cheese menu when A Full Plate and its universally-praised multigrain pasta-and-cheese dish is right down the street? It seems that some people are really loyal to their macaroni.

But are you? Is there one place in the city whose mac should be elevated above all others? A place where you turn when you need comfort food? Or do you just make some mac yourself? Leave us a comment and let us know what you do when you're feeling a serious need to mack on mac, and what you feel about Swallow's radical decision.

Image Credit: Flickr user star5112

Whiz of the Web: Wednesday Whiz-Up

The best of the internet, squirted out in flavorful neon globules, just for you.

Yesterday was the 40th birthday of the mouse. Not the animal, the gadget! Wired has a gallery looking back at how everybody's favorite pointing device has changed over the years. Happy belated, little guy!

We watched the trailer for Powder Blue for one reason only: because it features Jessica Biel as a stripper. But now that we've seen it, we have to say with some surprise that it's a really beautiful and powerful preview for what looks like a really interesting film.

The full trailer for Terminator Salvation is now online. We're afraid the movie might get a little corny... but it still looks pretty awesome. (Via)

Word has it that John Stevenson, director of Kung Fu Panda, will be directing the film adaptation of Grant Morrison's graphic novel We3.

It came out a while back that The Dark Knight would be disqualified from the Academy Awards' Best Soundtrack category because it had too many composers. Well, the Academy has reversed its decision and TDK is up for the award after all. And while we're talking about the Dark Knight soundtrack, check out this great behind-the-scenes story about the Joker theme.

You know how we love our year-end lists here at Phillyist, so we feel duty-bound to direct you to XPN's website, where you can now vote for the best albums and songs of 2008.

Oops—looks like Activision mistakenly left some CES 2009 video clips of their upcoming game Prototype lying around the internet, and Joystiq snapped them up. Watch them before they're gone!

Sony is feeling the bite from the bad economy. It's cutting 4 percent of its work force (8000 jobs), reining in spending, and shutting down plants.

MySpace is teaming up with Google in a campaign to extend MySpace's reach and counter the expansion of their common rival, Facebook.

"Fed up with earbud-wearing, cell phone-yakking motorists who don't heed sirens, police across the country are turning to a new attention-getting tool—low-frequency sound waves so strong they can actually be felt up to 200 feet away." The device generating the sound waves is called a Rumbler, and Wired describes it as a seismic siren.

A new study seems to show that dogs have a sense of fairness. Treat your pooch well, or he will know it, and he will seek... vengeance!

A team of Japanese scientists have performed an experiment that seems to show it's quite possible that life arose on Earth thanks to the impact of meteorites into an early ocean.

Cinematical lists seven memorable December films.

Rumor has it that Chris Weitz, director of The Golden Compass, has been offered the job of directing the Twilight sequel, New Moon.

Now here's a gift idea: a personalized poster of the Hoff!

Cinematical collects together a bunch of first look screenshots from upcoming Sony Pictures films, including Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.

20th Century Fox has decided to adapt a nine-year-old's book into a film. It's a 46-page self-help book called How to Talk to Girls. We really enjoy Cinematical's headline for this story: "Fox Gives Up, Will Adapt Fourth Grader's Book."

Here's a Windows app that lets you save web videos you've watched.

Wow, Microsoft is launching a clothing line. So when can we get our official Blue Screen of Death T-shirts?

Check out Sci Fi Wire's coverage of a special press conference with the cast and creators of The Day the Earth Stood Still. Then cower in horror at the thought that the film may be the first thing aliens know of us, as it will be transmitted into deep space on the day of its release.

Frank Langella talks about a couple of his upcoming projects: The Tale of Despereaux and The Box.

Some more details on the upcoming video game Halo Wars.

Free Watchmen stuff on iTunes!

Game|Life got the info on the bonus content that will be included in the North American console version of Street Fighter IV.

The system requirements for the PC version of Mirror's Edge. Also check out this pretty sweet 2D version of the game (via).

The Wii game Rygar: The Battle of Argus, scheduled to be released this week, has now been delayed until February 3, 2009.

As one might expect, a video game tie-in to the upcoming film X-Men Origins: Wolverine is on its way. It will be released in May of 2009.

Lev Grossman at Nerd World talks about Mamoru Oshii's new film, The Sky Crawlers, posting a trailer, his incorrect interpretation of same, and a corrected plot summary.

As many scientists and astronomers suspected, there is indeed a black hole at the center of our galaxy.

We can expect the first Transformers 2 trailer in February.

Broccoli Kitten Loves Broccoli! It's the video of the year! Okay, maybe not. But it is terribly cute.

When writer for Battlestar Galactica Bradley Thompson got married recently, Admiral Adama himself (okay, it was really Edward James Olmos) officiated, and the ceremony ended with a rousing chorus of "SO SAY WE ALL!"

Reprints of Star Trek comics are now available on iTunes for reading on the iPhone and iPod Touch.

Heh. Apparently the Wii is a big hit in Japan's love hotels, which are exactly what you think they are.

More videos from Tatsunoko vs. Capcom, and the news that some folks who imported the game received it ahead of the ship date.

According to Gamestop, the Wii and PS2 versions of Rock Band 2 will ship on December 18th.

Super Punch's latest link roundup has some fun stuff in it, including a cathedral as a hot air balloon, Google's pick for the worst band in the world, a weird story about a kiss that made a woman temporarily deaf, and an amusing mock poster satirizing the auto bailout.

The ED-209 from Robocop, in LEGO form.

In case you were curious, the arcade version of Guitar Hero will be based on Guitar Hero III.

Image Credit: Flickr user Darwin Bell

Countdown to 2009: Angela's Top 10 2008 Theatrical Releases To Be Watched on DVD in 2009

10. Wanted
Sorry, but I like Angelina Jolie. Maybe watching her on screen in this type of film satisfies my own personal bad ass needs. I read the script for Wanted a while ago and thought it was going to be a great action flick. Supposedly the final movie version was reworked to center more on Angie's character, Fox, so I'll probably like it even more with more of her, though hopefully that doesn't mean less of James McAvoy.

9. Red Belt
I'm a David Mamet gal. So much so that I'm currently reading his book Bambi vs. Godzilla: On the Nature, Purpose, and Practice of the Movie Business. I know nothing of this movie except having seen the trailer at the theater earlier this year, I wrote the title down on my little notebook list of movies to see. But all I need to know is Mamet, that's good enough for me. Now it's in my Netflix queue.

8. Appaloosa
I really, really like Ed Harris, so I ought to see this film that was co-written, directed, and starred in by him. Also, it's cute that he puts his dad in his movies.

7. Shine a Light
Scorsese directing a The Rolling Stones documentary/concert film? Yes please. And not only because I was named after a Stones song.

6. Bottle Shock
A sleeper that got great reviews, but no real play in the theaters. The story is based on the account of a 1976 blind wine taste test in Paris which left the French up in arms after California wines prevailed. The film stars Alan Rickman as the British born/Paris based wine ~~snob~~ merchant who organized the event that was known as "The Judgment of Paris."

5. My Blueberry Nights
Ever since seeing Wong Kar-wai's In the Mood For Love I've been entranced by his filmmaking. I'd been anticipating My Blueberry Nights, his first full English-language picture, for a long time but somehow its theatrical release just passed by me unnoticed. Perhaps since it had been in the works so long, then took forever for distribution, I just let it slip through the cracks. It definitely deserves a viewing, especially to see the acting debut of Norah Jones.

4. I've Loved You So Long
I love seeing Kristin Scott Thomas breeze through the French language like it's her native tongue.

3. The Dark Knight
Yes, I'm the one person in America who didn't see this. The thought of viewing Heath Ledger's frightening performance as The Joker so soon after his death freaked me out. I'm prone to nightmares and I figured I was just setting myself up for some bad ones. But as time passes, I'm thinking I should give this movie a shot on my tiny television set.

2. Man On Wire
As author Ann Patchett says in the recent New York Times article "Moments That Mattered," James Marsh's documentary about high wire walker Phillippe Petit "reminds us of all that art is capable of when what is risked is everything." The doc showcases Petit's high wire walk between the World Trade Towers in August of 1974, a time before the construction of the Towers was even completed. Patchett wishes that the Towers could be remembered for their beginning "with the felonious act of a young man who was madly in love with them, their height, their audacity, their doubled beauty—instead of how they ended."

1. Rachel Getting Married
Along with Mamet, Sidney Lumet is another one of my filmmaker icons. Ever since studying his work in a college film course, I've looked to him as somewhat of a role model. So now seeing that his daughter Jenny has written such a wonderful and critically acclaimed film, I'm downright ashamed that I didn't catch this one on its opening weekend.

Image via About.com

One-Team Teaser

Ugh! Every year with this shit.

In a classic case of the Michael Corleones (“Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in,”) the Eagles have decided that they’re not quite dead yet.

So it’s time to pose a question to the Philly Faithful, how should we feel about the Eagles right now?

Here’s what we've got: they have a very real shot of making the playoffs, Brian Westbrook looks on top of things again, and the Birds are a lot healthier than other teams in the NFC.

But here’s what COULD happen. We all get excited again (especially considering that they should trounce the Browns the way they SHOULD have trounced the Bengals), we invest in them, but they fall short and miss the playoffs. We dry our tears with our World Series T-shirts.

Or…

They make they playoffs and get booted.

Make no mistake, the Eagles cannot and will not make it to the Super Bowl (although I’ll gladly eat those words) and making the playoffs might justify Darth Lurie keeping Andy Reid on for another year. Now, just a few weeks ago, everyone was clamoring for Reid’s job. The consensus was that it was time to rebuild, even if that meant biting the bullet of one or two losing seasons.

It seemed everyone was on board with the fact that the Eagles needed to fundamentally change the philosophy of that team.

If they make the playoffs, can you really see that happening?

So with three more games remaining, the question is this. Do we WANT the Eagles to make the playoffs? In this season of giving, do we even give a shit?

There’s a lot of different avenues to take here, so let’s get some lively discussion going. Comment below.

Also, I’m going to start running a mailbag column every once in a while starting after Christmas (providing I get enough e-mails). So if you wanna run your mouth off about something, suggest some good ideas, or just generally tell me I suck, shoot me (not you, Plax) an email.

Proofreading Philly

Proofreading Philly tries to capture typos, wordos, and all other kinds of grammatical mistakes that we see around the city. But we need your help! Email photos to us from your computer or your phone, and show the city that you care about good grammar.

A reader who asked to remain anonymous sent us this awesome typo from the Metro homepage on Monday.

We know times are tough for the newspaper business right now, but doesn't the Metro still have at least one copyeditor on staff to catch things like this before they go live?

Proofreading Philly

Tommy submitted this one to us after he saw it at Taqueria Veracruzana on Washington Ave. Damn those similarly spelled words!

Countdown to 2009: Melissa's Top 10 Fashion Trends of 2008

10. Vests. These are a personal favorite of mine. You can buy them cheap at a place like Old Navy. Or, opt for a more expensive version like the ones seen here. These vests look cute at the office over a crisp, button-down white shirt, or are nice on the weekends over a plain t-shirt.

9. Flats. I'm a big fan of flats, especially since I wreaked havoc on my feet with heels for the past five years. Flats are—dare I say—more stylish and fun than heels. You can dress them up or style them down. They also look great with skinny jeans. If you're going casual try these. For a dressier look try these.

8. Black nail polish. Black nail polish makes even the most cookie-cutter chick look instantly dark and twisty. Check out these dark shades from O.P.I. But, beware. When these colors chip you don't look like the classiest girl in town. Word on the street is that gray is the new black in '09. Good thing because the gray doesn't look nearly as bad when it chips, and it's a lot more subtle than the black. Kind of like "I'm dark and twisty, but not THAT dark and twisty." Try this one, also from O.P.I., called "Sheer Your Toys!"

7. Flannels. I never thought I'd see the day when flannels came back. It actually makes me really happy because it brings out the 90s alternative kid in me. I really like this one. You may see me around town sporting one with an old Nirvana t-shirt. Smells Like Teen Spirit.

6. Carrie Bradshaw-like heels. While flats are all the rage, there's nothing sexier than a gorgeous heel. These were all over the Sex and the City movie. If you don't feel like you can pull these off, opt for a pair of flats, which are just as nice.

5. Go Green shopping bags. I'm all for "going green," as people and companies say, but I must admit it's strange that being environmentally conscious is a fashion trend. Oh well. I'll take what I can get. Whole Foods has been selling these bags for years, and it's great that the rest of retail is finally catching on. Try these cute ones seen here and here.

4. Equestrian style boots. Like flats, these boots look awesome over skinny jeans. And, they usually come with a small heel and rounded toe, which is much more comfortable than the hooker-type styles. My feet thank these boots every day. Try these in black or brown.

3. Bright colors. Yellow. Burnt orange the color of leaves. Basically, colors that go with fall. From handbags to coats, you'll see these colors all over, and they look darn good. Check out these looks from InStyle.

2. Accessories. What you wear says something about you, and nothing does that more than accessories. Take a black t-shirt and add a funky necklace. Now you have something that makes a statement. This year it was all about bangle bracelets, chunky necklaces, and scarves with unique prints.

1. Bangs. Hair is as much a part of your wardrobe as jackets and pants. This year bangs made the cut with women everywhere deciding to chop their locks for a modern cut with bangs. Recently, I noticed Alanis Morisette sporting the new look. Take a look at these celebrities with bangs and decide if you want to try the look for yourself.

Image credit: Flickr user LeeLeeLu

Sparky and Snarky

Sparky & Snarky is now being brought to you twice a week, Mondays and Thursdays, right here on Phillyist. Do you have questions about sex, dating, or relationships? Then we've got answers, whether you like them or not. Send your short but informative queries, complete with clever signatures, to sparkyandsnarky@phillyist.com and wait for the magic to happen.

Soooooooooo hypothetically speaking, say you are dating someone who has previously been with only men, and you find yourself getting jealous and picturing her having sex with men every time she brings up her past relationships. Even though she tells you that she wants no one but you, you can't help but worry that she must be missing the penis! How do you deal with that?
- Perturbed by Penii

Dear PbP,
Get over it. If you don't think you can compete with the male member and you can't hear this grrl telling you that she digs you and not some dude she used to date, then maybe you want to go have an encounter with said organ. Let's face it, you're the one thinking about it all the time, not her! As one hot dyke to potentially another, always assume that you rock her world and that no one (boy or grrl) can do it better. Confidence is everything.
Love,
Snarky

Woah there, Snark. Having been raised in a society where practically everything (even the "art" to commemorate almost every hero or heroine) is penis-centric, it's not far-fetched that someone who has to compete with overwhelming social pressure might be a little freaked out. You and I agree on one thing though, confidence will see you through, and if you haven't got confidence, fake it 'til you make it. Basically, I'm suggesting you recondition yourself. Every time you start hyperventilating at the thought of your hottie's body having been in contact with a man's, change the scenario. Imagine her laughing at it, imagine her being very underwhelmed, imagine it wilting like a sad, floppy flower. And then switch gears and remember last night when she was seriously satisfied with the way you rolled her over and... well, you know. Unless she wasn't, in which case, write us another letter and we'll help. My point is this, in case you didn't know, most dudes feel a little sheepish about their flailing members and you should join them in that perception, intensify it, and come to understand that your grrl really does dig you and you have no reason to be threatened by the penii.
It's all in your head, so give yourself a break,
Sparky!

Sparky and Snarky

Dear Sparky and Snarky,
Are sex toys appropriate holiday gifts? What's the protocol for giving them?
-Gettin' Jiggy with the Gifties

Dear Jiggy,
Sex toys are appropriate anytime gifts, provided you know the recipient well enough. Are you having sex with this person? If so, it's probably okay to get him or her something from the local adult boutique (I personally recommend Passional on 5th Street if you're in Philly). The key is knowing what exactly to get. If your bed buddy already has a collection of sexual accoutrements, get something new and different for the two of you to play with together. If his or her bedside drawer is woefully empty, start with something basic like a vibrator. Remember, silicon, glass and metal toys can be sterilized. Cheap jelly crap cannot. Don't be a scrooge—if you're going this route for xxxmas, spring for the good stuff. And whatever you do, don't wrap this up and put it under the Christmas tree, Hanukkah bush or Festivus pole if your in-laws are spending the holiday with you. No amount of spiked eggnog will prepare your lover's mother for that.
xo, Snarky

Well, Jiggy, seeing as I have a big bag full of great kinky gifts, I really hope it's appropriate!
(Another hint on where to get stuff locally, folks—you can WIN sex toys at Kinky Quizzo. Other cities just aren't as rad as Philly; Kinky Quizzo is a homegrown phenomena and my favorite date/location is Tuesday nights at Valanni's.)

Snarky's pretty spot-on concerning whom to give to, when and how, but let me just make a few quick points:
1) Sex toys are also completely appropriate between friends, not just people you're hopping in the sack with. If you're good friends and you talk sex, then you should feel free to give tools for sexual enhancement. Some people don't buy good stuff for themselves, so help them out!
2) Remember the disappointment of getting an awesome toy that took batteries, but there were no batteries in it? Friends don't give friends sex toys without lube and batteries, got it?
3) I would like a Violet Wand. I'm just saying.
Sparky!

Monday Manners: Stripper Tippers

I've been known to visit a strip club once in a while. I was actually at one on Saturday night—an excursion I'd been planning with a female friend and our significant others for quite some time.

Despite what Pacman Jones might make you believe, strip clubs are usually pretty low-key—or at least as low key as any place can be when there are exposed breasts and alcohol involved. I've never seen a brawl break out at a strip club. I've never seen anybody drunkenly solicit a dancer for more than a dance—at least not without getting thrown out by a bouncer before he can finish the sentence. I've never seen the dancers touched inappropriately or the cocktail waitresses asked why they're not dancing.

What I have seen at strip clubs, though, is some really rude tipping. Not the waitresses or bartenders or even the nice girls who dry hump you while pouring watered-down shots straight down your throat. They usually do just fine. It's the dancers themselves who are often the subject of the un-mannerly tip. There were two different but equally rude tipping methods I observed on Saturday, and because strip clubs tend to do a brisk business this time of year (escapism, perhaps?), it seemed like a good time to examine each of them.

Stage-side Seating
Clubs get crowded. Often, the non-VIP seats and the barstools fill up before midnight, so late arrivants either get to stand or they take the seats at the stage—a serious no-no if you're not planning on tipping every dancer performing while you're there. Or, if not every dancer, then at least a good number of them. Sitting at the stage nursing your over-priced beer and keeping your ones safely tucked away in your pocket is just plain rude. It's like going to a bar and only ordering water or going to a restaurant and only eating the free bread. If you're there, you should be paying for services rendered. Your cover charge does not count.

"Making It Rain"
Hey big spender! Everyone at the club—the dancers included—is really glad you want to blow some cash tonight. You're tipping your favorite dancers ten dollars, when everyone else goes for a buck or two. But they'd appreciate it a lot more if you tucked a ten in their g-strings rather than "making it rain" with ones. That's right fellas: throwing a handful of crisp one dollar bills over the stage is rude. More than that, it's demeaning. Each dancer only gets a few seconds to gather her clothes and get offstage before the next featured entertainer comes on, and having to scramble around the stage to pick up stray ones (not easy on the slippery floor, it seems) is nothing less than inconvenient and puts the girl in a position that's insulting: having to crawl around on her hands and knees and scoop up the money you so graciously threw at her. It's a heartbeat away from begging.

You may be asking yourself why it matters if you're checking your manners at the door along with your coat and camera phone, when the dancers chose that line of work. The answer is simple: no matter what it is they're doing on that stage, those women are still working. You wouldn't want somebody to come into your office and disrespect you, right? Right. So next time you're at a club, don't be a jackass. They may be taking their clothes off for money, but strippers are people, too. And they deserve better than that.

Image Credit: Flickr user Jukebox Design.

An Examination of Alien Technology

Phillyist was lucky enough to be among those invited to the Bridge theater yesterday morning for a special presentation by DreamWorks Animation's co-founder and CEO Jeffrey Katzenberg. Katzenberg came by to talk about DreamWorks' new 3D technology, and show us clips from an upcoming film that takes advantage of that technology: the computer-animated movie Monsters vs Aliens. Katzenberg started things off by saying there have been two revolutionary changes in film technology—the introduction of sound in the '20s and the introduction of color in the '30s—and that this new 3D technology will be the third revolutionary change. That's pretty big talk, especially considering the fact that 3D was already introduced some years ago, and disappeared along with other movie fads of the time. But Katzenberg was quick to separate this new 3D technology from what he called "my Dad's 3D." He said the problems of the old 3D (the two different images being out of sync, the ugly blue and red coloration, the blurry image, the glasses that hurt your head and could even make you sick) have all been solved. Now the glasses are comfortable, and the image is smooth and flicker free. He used a metaphor from music distribution to explain the difference between 2D movies and this new 3D: it's equivalent to the step up from a vinyl record to a digital recording. It's a more perfect representation of reality. He also stressed that DreamWorks has completely altered the way it makes movies so it can film in 3D, rather than take a 2D film and convert it to 3D after the fact (which he compared to the process of colorizing black and white films). He expects 3D films to re-energize what it means to go see a movie in the theater. It will bring people back out into the theaters in larger numbers, because it will be a premium experience that you can't have at home. Unfortunately, that also means you'll have to pay a premium price for it; we're talking $5 on top of the already pretty ridiculous price you have to pay for a movie ticket.

But enough about how great 3D is supposed to be—how great is it actually? How about those movie clips? A detailed description can be found after the jump.After a short explanation of the film's premise (which is that aliens are attacking the Earth, and our last hope is the monsters that the American government has secretly captured and imprisoned over the years), Katzenberg showed us three clips, each something like five minutes in length. The first opens with a huge alien probe that has landed on Earth. Its one giant eye is staring around at the military personnel and vehicles arranged around it. The President of the United States (voiced, appropriately enough, by Stephen Colbert) steps up to personally make contact with the alien, using an amusing method: he plays it some familiar music on a keyboard. The probe reacts violently, pulls itself out of the ground, and turns into a giant rampaging robot. As one might expect, conventional Earth weapons have no effect on it. The President retreats to a war room very like the one in Dr. Strangelove and discusses options with his advisers. General W.R. Monger (Kiefer Sutherland) offers the only reasonable plan: to unleash the monsters on the aliens. He profiles for the President each of the monsters, including the most recent addition to the team: a woman named Susan Murphy (voiced by Reese Witherspoon) who grew almost fifty feet tall, and got super strong to boot, after being struck by a meteor on her wedding day.

In the second clip, we pick up with Susan right after her traumatic growth spurt. She wakes up inside a metal room, not sure where she is or how she got there. She's pushed out into a much larger enclosed area where she meets her fellow monsters: the half-bug mad scientist Dr. Cockroach (Hugh Laurie), the indestructible (but very stupid) gelatinous blob known as B.O.B. (Seth Rogen), the Missing Link (who looks sort of like the Creature from the Black Lagoon), and Insectosaurus, a huge (even bigger than Susan) caterpillar-like thing whose roars only the Missing Link can interpret. Susan is horrified of them all, and grateful when General Monger comes in to escort her to her orientation.

The third clip opens right after the monsters have been dropped into San Francisco to face off against the alien probe. Susan is still getting used to her new height and strength, and at first flees the probe by roller skating on cars. When the probe attacks the Golden Gate Bridge, she realizes she has to help, and turns back to fight, trying to get the other monsters to help her (and they do, a little, although there's also a lot of bumbling and confusion). After a lot of damage to the bridge (and probably a good number of fatalities amongst the innocent bystanders, which was a little surprising, given the movie's otherwise very light, comedic feel), the monsters do succeed in destroying the probe—but as Katzenberg pointed out afterwards, they've only won the battle, not the war.

After the clips, there was a Q&A session, which Katzenberg used as an excuse to cover the rest of his talking points. One of the most encouraging things he said was that all the money and technology in the world won't make a bad movie good, and that the story is still all-important. It's very good to hear him say that. A company that's spent all the time and money building this technology might be tempted to relax on the other aspects of filmmaking, and just trust on the razzle dazzle of 3D to get them by, but it sounds like Katzenberg is not content with that. Another interesting point he made, again to highlight the differences between the old 3D and the new 3D, is that whereas in the old days, filmmakers would deliberately try to break the fourth wall and push things out at the audience to show off the technology, and thus bring you out of the movie, the new 3D filmmakers will never poke at the audience or break the fourth wall, because they're using 3D to bring you into the movie, to make it a more immersive experience.

Katzenberg is a huge believer in the future of this technology, and thinks it can be applied equally well to any genre, even a cop drama like The Departed. But it's a technology that's still growing. Right now only about 1500 theaters around the country are equipped to project the new digital 3D. By the time Monsters vs. Aliens is released, Katzenberg expects 1000 more theaters will have been converted. By 2010 (when the next Shrek film is supposed to come out), he figures 7500 will be equipped. Of course, if a theater near you isn't equipped, that doesn't mean you can't see the movie at all; you'll still be able to see it in regular old 2D, and for cheaper, at a standard theater.

But will people pay the premium ticket price for the full experience, even if they have the option? Katzenberg is betting they will. He pointed out that the movie business is doing just fine, even in the current shaky economy, and that really in terms of things you can do for entertainment, going to see a movie is a great bargain.

Katzenberg also talked about the further advances in technology that are down the road—getting 3D in the home (which he downplayed as impractical, because obviously he wants you to come to the theater to experience it); owning your own pair of 3D glasses that might double as sunglasses; spreading 3D to all forms of video, even portable players like iPods; and getting the 3D effect without glasses (which is already possible—it's called autostereo—but only on a very small scale). He also talked about what inspired him to go down this road in the first place (Polar Express 3D really excited him, and he saw a lot of promise in the technology), and another big advantage that should come out of 3D: a big decrease in piracy! Apparently 90% of piracy is people in theaters recording the movie with a camcorder, and if you tried to do that with a 3D movie, it would look like garbage.

And that was it for the presentation. This Phillyist walked out reasonably impressed, but with reservations. When we caught an old school 3D screening of The Creature from the Black Lagoon a few years ago, it made us wonder why 3D never caught on, and why they hadn't fixed the problems with the technology and brought it back. So we're excited to see all that happening now. That being said, despite Katzenberg's claims, we found the new glasses, like the old ones, still gave us a mild headache (although that could be because this Phillyist had to wear them on top of his regular glasses, and also has a pretty large head that the one-size-fits-all 3D glasses clung to a bit more tightly than was entirely comfortable). And although the effect was impressive and immersive, it didn't seem nearly as revolutionary as Katzenberg was making it out to be. The movie itself, technology aside, seems entertaining, imaginative, and funny, and we'd definitely like to make it out to see the whole thing in all its 3D glory when the time comes. But we'd really rather do it for free, and review it for Phillyist, than pay that extra $5 for the ticket.

Image Credit: DreamWorks Animation

Green Scene: Bicycle Bailout

It seems these days that everyone wants a piece of the $700 billion bailout bill, and now you, Philadelphia bicyclist, can have your piece of the monetary pie. Hidden within the bailout bill was a provision for anyone who bikes to work "regularly" to receive a $20 a month tax break from their employers, courtesy of the federal government.

Legislators hope that the $20 can help defray the cost of things like tubes, tires, and occasional tune-ups. And since Philadelphia is such a bike-friendly city, now there’s more incentive than ever to lessen your carbon footprint via pedal power.

So, how do I get this money, you’re probably asking yourself right now. That’s where it gets a little tricky. You can’t just sign yourself up. Here’s what you need to do:

First, the provision doesn’t start until January 1, so that gives you some lead time on step number two: you need to convince your employer to sign up to participate in the program.

Many employers already offer their employees transportation benefits for commuting expenses, usually in the form of cash reimbursement or a tax benefit. Now companies and organizations can do the same under the Bicycle Commuter Act. Employers can save all income and payroll taxes on the money they dole out to their employees to cover the cost of commuting. That means, your company can save an extra $240 per year, per employee bicyclist, while at the same time showing concern for the environment. It’s a win-win situation.

Currently, the League of American Bicyclists is working feverishly to try to ensure that implementation guidelines are set up before year’s end, so check their website for information that you can pass along to your boss. And, you can send a little thank you note to two Oregon legislators, Congressman Earl Blumenauer (D-OR) and Senator Ron Wyden (D-OR), for getting this bill through the morass of the legislative branch.

In the meantime, if you’re not already a bike commuter, get thee a bike. You’ll save on gas and/or transpass money and even have a little extra dough in your pocket at year’s end.

Image credit: Flickr user tandemracer

PAWS Dog of the Week

Help make the animals' holiday wishes come true! If you're not in a position to adopt an animal right now, consider fostering, or simply donate to PAWS so that it has the financial resources to do its incredible, life-saving work.

The new year will bring some exciting changes for PAWS, so stay tuned on details on how PAWS will operate in 2009 and what you can do to help!

Rex (ID# A06857471)

Rex is a handsome sweetheart of a Pitty. His calm, loving demeanor has made him a staff favorite. Rex is an adult, 4 to 6 years old, and he's another one of our great deaf dogs of the week. Rex is fully housebroken, crate trained, and neutered. He gets along well with other dogs, but not so much with cats. He was brought to the shelter only because his humans could no longer afford to care for him, and he's very confused and stressed out by the shelter. A new, loving, forever home is exactly what he needs to get 2009 off to the right start, so head over to the shelter to meet him!

If you'd like to meet Rex and consider saving him, you can set up an appointment to meet him by contacting Natalie at natalie@phillypaws.org. (Rex is not viewable for walk-ins; you must make an appointment.) Make sure to include Rex's ID number in the e-mail. The adoption fee for a PAWS dog is $40, plus an $8 city license fee if you live in Philadelphia. The fee includes spaying/neutering, which will be performed before your new companion comes home with you, and microchipping. Rex is currently resident at the PAWS shelter, which is located at 111 West Hunting Park Ave (map).

Image via PAWS.

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Sparky and Snarky

Dear Sparky and Snarky,
I'm dating multiple women but none of them play rough in bed the way I like. How can I find one that will? Have all the lesbians gone vanilla? Clearly I've been looking hard for something more, what am I missing here?
-Go Hard or Go Home

Dear GH²,
I don't think the problem is where you're looking, it's what you're asking for. I've seen this over and over: dykes who want more from their sex partners but somehow expect those partners to psychically know what they want. That doesn't fly in gay or straight bedrooms, people. If you can't talk about what you like, preferably before you even get into the bedroom, then don't expect to find it more than two times out of 100. You're setting the whole situation up for failure if you can't work a little, "I don't mind biting, *wink* or a little game of tie-me-up" into the flirting. And if you tell them ahead of time what you like and they don't deliver, at least they were forewarned when you go looking for something more your speed. Save yourself some time, GH², tell the ladies what you like before you get naked!
May you take control of your sex life in the New Year,
Sparky!

Well, grrl, this is an issue near and dear to my heart. If you ask me (and hey, you did), the ladies of Philly really need to stop being... well, ladies. Step up your game, sisters—no one wants candlelight and rose petals all the time, and some of us don't want that crap ever. Anyway, Sparky's partially correct here—you can't get what you want unless you ask for it. If you're a big ol' bottom, maybe you're more comfortable taking orders than making requests, but give your top something to work with. A little "harder, faster, more... no, HARDER!" in the heat of the moment is a good start if you can't have a frank conversation before you strip down. Leaving a riding crop and some ropes lying around the bedroom might help get the message across, too. My dear Sparky is, however, wrong about one thing: where you're looking counts, too. You're probably going to have better luck finding a BDSM-friendly babe on a fetish site or at a fetish party than at your local dive bar or on some vanilla dating site. Look for the girls with the fresh bruises, buy them a drink, then ask them where they've been playing. Maybe one of them will take you along for the ride next time. Just make sure you pick out a safe word first.
xo, Snarky

Countdown to 2009: Bill's Top Ten Albums of 2008

10. Oracular Spectacular – MGMT
The debut album from two pseudo-hippies from Brooklyn, New York—singer/guitarist Andrew VanWyngarden and multi-instrumentalist Ben Goldwasser—blends crunching guitars, soaring synthesizers, and a speaker-tweaking production technique (courtesy of Flaming Lips producer and Nigel Tufnel impersonator Dave Fridmann) to create a power-pop gem with a futuristic feel—sort of like peak Weezer releasing an album recorded on the Millennium Falcon. Highlights include the danceable album opener "Time to Pretend," the funk of "Electric Feel," and the epic mood shifter "Of Moons, Birds & Monsters."

9. You Have No Idea What You're Getting Yourself Into – Does It Offend You, Yeah?
This British synthesizer-driven foursome was going to have to release a stunner to make me like them. After all, their name is Does It Offend You, Yeah? I hate band names with punctuation. It makes the grammar check tell me I'm wrong when I know I'm not, and I really hate arguing with my computer. Anyway, the band with the comma and the question mark seriously impresses with its first full-length album. They show as much skill on instrumental freak-outs "Battle Royale" and "Attack of the 60 Ft. Lesbian Octopus" as they do on proper narratives, such as "Dawn of the Dead"—a song reminiscent of the Killers before they lost control of their egos and their mascara—and the propulsive dance-rock of "Being Bad Feels Pretty Good."8. Flight of the Conchords – Flight of the Conchords
Most people are familiar with the New Zealand parody duo Flight of the Conchords (Jemaine Clement and Bret McKenzie) through their brilliant HBO seri... oh wait. Nobody watches that channel anymore since they canceled Deadwood for no reason. Well, anyway, Flight of the Conchords is coming back in January 2009, and the uninitiated may want to familiarize themselves by listening to this album. It is enjoyable not only for how funny it is, but also for how musically refined it turned out to be. The album primarily consists of songs produced for the television series, but also includes some that originated as part of their live act. While maintaining their original structure, the songs benefit from the addition of keyboards, drums, and other accouterments. The result is the proto-reggae of "Boom," the faux soul of "The Most Beautiful Girl (In the Room)," and, in a relatively weak year for hip-hop, what might be the best rap tune of the year, "Mutha'uckas."

7. Heart On – Eagles of Death Metal
Maybe this band is a side project for Queens of the Stone Age front man Josh Homme, but it is one really, really good side project. Homme, as drummer here with singer/guitarist Jesse Hughes, has found gold with the stripped-down, straightforward rock of his "time-killing" duo. The band, which had success with its 2006 album Death by Sexy, registers even stronger this time with a recipe that includes sophomoric lyrics, crushing percussion, and a gang of riffs so ripped-off from Keith Richards you might assume that Hughes has a man-crush on the mummified Rolling Stone—which he does, and is proud of it. While the entire album is bruising, good fun, one must only look to showcase "High Voltage" for why this set of 12 songs kicks ass: the tweeter-blowing intro hands off to a dagger-sharp scratch-guitar riff, which leads to a chorus so simple and huge it transcends literature class. "She loves rock 'n roll?" Uh... so do I, and this album is kinda why.

6. Robyn – Robyn
It's hard to believe that the stylish, envelope-pushing pop on the fourth album by Swedish chanteuse Robyn could get made in 2008, an age of cynical corporations hiring overexposed songsmiths to write tired clichés for prepackaged teenyboppers to sell digital units to mindless, tween iPod owners. Of course it can't, since this album was actually released in her homeland in 2005 and took three years to get to the United States after time as an international sensation in the U.K. and across Europe. Once it hit the States, the thinking was that domestic music enthusiasts would be blown away by the hip-hop tinged "Bum Like You," the innovative, retro-Chic "Crash and Burn Girl," and the entrancing R&B of "Anytime You Like." Alas, the album didn't really catch fire because Robin Miriam Carlsson is older than 15, and, well... the Jonas Brothers are in town tonight!!! Anyway, it is still an incredible album.

5. Attack & Release – The Black Keys
For pure, blow-your-hair-back blues rock, not many bands can match the Akron duo of Dan Auerbach (guitar and vocals) and Patrick Carney (drums). On this release, their incredible sound is bolstered by the technical and keyboard wizardry of uber-producer Brian "Danger Mouse" Burton. Could these songs have worked just as well with the duo's usual minimalist approach? Perhaps. But the extra depth added by the producer leaves the listener glad to not have an answer to that question. The tinkering reaps major rewards in almost every song, but several stand out as highlights. In "Psychotic Girl," Burton's ragtime piano matches well with Auerbach's banjo-plucking breakdown, while a perfectly placed Hammond organ adds greatly to the drama of album closer "Things Ain't Like They Used to Be." If you like the band more as the grimy, surging pair you used to know, you can press repeat on the tracks where the producer keeps to the sound board, such as "I Got Mine" and "Remember When (Side B)."

4. Modern Guilt – Beck
It was quite a year for Danger Mouse. I've already mentioned his work with The Black Keys, and his band, Gnarls Barkley, released The Odd Couple, a solid follow-up to their 2006 debut, St. Elsewhere. Since his schedule wasn't already packed enough, he served as producer on the eighth studio album from the inimitable Beck Hansen. Many critics have said that the album is a return to form after the mixed results of Guero and The Information. As a fan who has never heard a full-length Beck album that I would rate below a solid B, it is tough for me to say that. I will simply say that the end of the world, which seems to be the jumping-off point for most of the lyrics on Modern Guilt, has never sounded so fresh and full of sonic vitality. For instance, "Gamma Ray" is supposed to be about global warming or something, but all I can hear is the sound of one of those 1960s Annette Funicello-Frankie Avalon surf movies with a house band of some obscure British Invasion collective that I am not cool enough to have ever heard of. Other standouts include "Youthless"—a labyrinthine masterpiece built out of a looped guitar, some space-age tape effects, and Beck's underrated MC skills—and "Replica," a drum-and-bass driven piece of distortion topped off with strings and, of course, Burton's keyboard noodles.

3. Vampire Weekend – Vampire Weekend
Not since The Strokes 2001 release, Is This It?, has an album been so full of hummable melodies and perfectly structured choruses. Of course, when history looks back and wonders which band launched the end-of-the-decade regurgitation of Afro pop wannabes, this will be the band to blame. But, for now, it is OK to sit back, relax, and enjoy the fruits of the foursome's seeming obsession with Johann Sebastian Bach and Paul Simon's Graceland. Mixing in classical instruments, echoing drums, and the distinctive sound of singer Ezra Koenig's vocals, Vampire Weekend constructs an album full of songs that could have been released as first singles. Love-struck romantics at heart, the group shines brightly on up-tempo love songs like "Bryn" and "Campus," which are both marked by jumpy guitar lines, thumping drums, and pulsing keys courtesy of multi-instrumentalist/producer/guy with unpronounceable last name Rostam Batmanglij. Still, the band is not all pep and light. Witness the epic closer and possible economic indicator "The Kids Don't Stand a Chance," a beautiful, four-minute mini-concerto consisting mostly of violin, a lonely bass drum, and a single keyboard note.

2. Third – Portishead
Back into the mist they go. No tour. No appearances on Leno. No agreement to prostitute themselves through merchandising agreements with Volkswagen, Walmart, or Starbucks. The only thing we got out of British trio Portishead once they emerged from their 11-year slumber was a date at Coachella, a tiny tour of Europe, and an album of ominous, kaleidoscopic, psychedelic, and, yes, mind-blowing songs called Third. Now they're all back to their personal lives or whatever. To be fair, though, you may take another full decade listening to this 11-song set and still find something new to chew on with every trip through the ol' Apple listening device. There is the pure joy of hearing lead singer Beth Gibbons, a singular voice in 1990s “alternative” music, actually opening her mouth and forming syllables to music. There is the pure wonder of finding out where the group is going to take each song from moment to moment. Many of the songs feature dramatic shifts in their direction, including "The Rip," which moves from tender guitar plucking to piercing drum-and-keyboard theatrics. And then there are the sonic adventures for which nothing in the previous Portishead discography can prepare even the most devoted listener. Two particular examples are "We Carry On," a stirring anthem energized by a humongous bass drum and a jangling lead guitar, and the absolutely ferocious "Machine Gun," in which Gibbons' delicate voice stands in stark contrast to a cornucopia of both traditional and digitized drums and a gang of mechanized sounds made by... you know what, I have no idea how they made them, but they rule!

1. Dear Science – TV on the Radio
The only question remaining now that Brooklyn quintet TV on the Radio has followed up its superior Return to Cookie Mountain with an even-better amalgam of funk, indie dance, and art rock is what's next…and when are they releasing it so I can get in line? While I knew that guitarist/singer Kyp Malone (who shares the duties with traditional front man Tunde Adebimpe) had a monster falsetto, I did not anticipate him using it to get his Prince on in "Crying," one of many album highlights. I knew producer David Andrew Sitek would continue to seek out new variations of the group's multilayered sound, I had no idea he would call on members of Antibalas Afrobeat Orchestra (it's OK if you don't know who these guys are; neither do I) to add rich horn sections to "Dancing Choose" and "Halfway Home." The group's previous work prepared me for the delicacy of their vocal harmonies, but the ornate "Family Tree" shone a new light on Malone and Adebimpe, voices that are quickly becoming two of the most interesting in the musical landscape. Finally, how can you not love an album that features a war protest song ("Red Dress") that, rather than going all gloomy, has the band going all upbeat and future-funk like Parliament Funkadelic fronted by a hip-hop Iggy Pop. As Malone would sing, "There's a golden age coming 'round," and hopefully it includes more albums by these guys.

Image Credit: Flickr user tammylo

Another Solution to the Budget Deficit

Well, the video does make a valid point.

A Holiday Tradition

One of our favorite Philly holiday traditions is the Reading Terminal Holiday Railroad. You can tell we like it because we've taken pictures of it and posted about it every year for the past three years. It's our own little tradition, and we're keeping up with it this year. Enjoy the photos, then go check out the display in person when you can. It's bound to brighten your day.

Reading Terminal Holiday Railroad Display
Lobby of the Reading Terminal Headhouse
Now through Wed, 12/31/08, 10AM-6PM (closed Christmas Day)

All photos by the author