See Ya Sundee...

Flickr user Jayel Aheram

I swear to deliver the picks, all of the picks and nothing but the picks. I just hope they're the correct picks.

HOME TEAMS in caps:

San Diego (-4.5) over KANSAS CITY
Keg's Kicked, KC. Party's over. San Diego may have Norval Eugene Turner, but that isn't enough for KC to win two in a row. Markt it: Phillip Rivers tosses 4 TDs. LDT runs for another. Next frame.

PITTSBURGH (-4.5) over Minnesota
Troy Polamalu is back. Hair is flying. Real. Comfortable. Jeans. are going to get really dirty this Sunday. It's going to take more than Vinsanthe Schlongcoe and Adrian Peterson this week, brother.

Green Bay (-6.5) over CLEVELAND
Don't Cleveland's team doctors get vials of flu vaccine? Seriously. How can a team be plagued by the flu? Hey Browns, mix in a flu shot.

New England (-14.5) over TAMPA BAY
New England is going to be in England one day before the Bucs. They just left this AM. We know how teams perform coming West-to-East in the lower 48. The equation for this game looks like this: (Bad Team + Trans-Atlantic Flight)/Tom Brady = 27 fewer points than the Patriots.

San Francisco (+3.5) over HOUSTON
I'm going to say that Mike Singletary has a game plan in place after the bye week to stop the Houston Texans offense. I'm also going to say that Shaun Hill has a monster day. Welcome to the NFL, Michael Crabtree.

Indianapolis (-12.5) over ST. LOUIS
Booleans!! Peyton Manning or Marc Bulger: Who has never thrown a TD pass in St. Louis? Peyton Manning! That. Will. Change.

CAROLINA (-3.5) over Buffalo
Two overtime games in two weeks. That's almost two extra quarters of football. If you don't think that matters to a team like the Bills, you're wrong.

NY Jets (-6.5) over OAKLAND
Evidence that Al Davis actually owns most of Northern California: Tom Cable is not going to be prosecuted for assault. Wow. You know what doesn't happen? People don't fall off of chairs when they're leaning back on them and fracture their jawbone, crack two teeth or bruise a knee and their back. Here's a great piece from Michael Silver at Yahoo! Sports about the incident.

Not even that is going to be enough for the Raiders to take down the Sanchize and the Jets on Sunday. Lighting doesn't strike twice in the same place.

Chicago (+1.5) over CINCINNATI
Lovie Smith. Marvin Lewis. This is where you're betting on who won't fuck up and lose the game. The loss of Antwan Odom tips the scales. Bears win.

MIAMI (+6.5) over New Orleans
This week is the week of teams coming off of bye weeks. I am taking every single one of them. Miami had an extra week to prepare for the Saints blitzes. Chad Henne looks insane-crazy-driving-miss-daisy cool under center.

DALLAS (-3.5) over Atlanta
And the week of teams-coming-off-of-bye-weeks continues.

Arizona (+6.5) over NY GIANTS
Take-the-over. Clap-clap-clapclapclap.

Philadelphia (-6.5) over WASHINGTON
The Eagles owe me after last week's debacle. BIG TIME. I'm actually going against the rule I implemented last week. I vowed never to take the Eagles again. Call it battered-bettor-syndrome, but there's no way the Eales can lose this game against a dude who is calling the offensive plays but hasn't coached in three years. Not sayin', just sayin'.

Last week: 5-9
Season: 49-41