Asshole of the Week

Photo by Flickr user cliff 1066

This week, we have a real set of winners. You know how on the Titanic, as it was sinking to its cold, watery grave, women and children were protected first? Because that's how the disaster cookie crumbles. In times of need, society moves to protect those who are deemed the least able to provide their own rescue.

Because we've really always lived in a world where people experience personal daily disaster while others frolic off in the sunshine of good times, and we aren't all heartless bastards content to let the less fortunate sink, we help them. One of the clear-cut ways we help the women and children is through WIC. Even hardline conservatives must agree that there is nothing wrong with this program—it provides women in need with coupons that cover specific groceries that they need for their children, including milk, cereal, bread, orange juice, and formula. There is no possible way to live large off of these cupboards staples. They simply allow hungry people to eat.

Or, at least that's the idea. It works less well when a group of six employed by WIC (Mikiba Carter, Gail Polk, Takarra Scott, Crystal Gray, Melvin Jones, and Tasha Riddick) steal $325,000 directly from the program. That is not cool. It's like gleefully singing out "Me first! I'm going to drop your baby in the ocean! 'Cause I hate babies!"

They created fake coupons to spend around town, and they used them for seven years before getting caught, but now they're facing charges. Each was charged with one count of theft by unlawful taking, one count of theft by deception, one count of receiving stolen property, one count of tampering with public records or information, and one count of criminal conspiracy.