Phillyist Rewind: Kristinia DeBarge

Photo via Kristinia DeBarge official site

You know you're getting old when the pop stars of your youth have children old enough to be pop stars. As a critic, it gives you a very Statler and Waldorf vibe even before you reach the venue: you just know you're going to be in your seat, muttering incoherently about "these kids today" and their sorry excuse for music, vehemently demanding that they get off your lawn.

So when we learned that 19-year-old Kristinia DeBarge was opening for Britney Spears on the Philly stop of Britney's Circus tour, it's fair to say we went into the show with a bit of skepticism. Kristinia's dad is James DeBarge, one of the DeBarges who made up '80s band DeBarge. But you know, the '80s were, like, such a long time ago, you know (OMG, LULZ, stab me in the eye)? One Phillyist reader too young to have experienced for herself the "Rhythm of the Night" (pity, that) mentioned that she didn't even know who he was. Whippersnapper!

But we're happy to report that the scant three songs Kristinia sang—and yes, we're almost certain she actually sang on the Britney tour, which we weren't sure was even legal—were actually... not bad. (Please note, we did send the lone pop music fan on staff to cover the show, so your mileage may vary.) It's generic radio pop, to be sure, and most of her songs are kind of forgettable, but she has a decent enough voice. If you've had the misfortune to get her top-40 single "Goodbye" stuck in your head, you have to admit the damn thing is catchy to the point of delirium.

DeBarge of course sang "Goodbye," as well as "Sabotage" and "It's Gotta Be Love" from her album Exposed. While we weren't really dying to see her do more, it wouldn't have been so bad if she had.

Having DeBarge continue certainly would have been preferable to the next opening act, the perfect solution for that aching void you've had in your soul ever since *NSYNC broke up. What? You don't have that void? Yeah, neither do we. But it seems Backstreet's back, alright, and the boy band powers have activated in the form of One Call. One Call could easily be the first in the next round of boy bands that's probably not going to quite make it. On the crap continuum of pop music (patent pending) they'd probably fall below 98 Degrees, but above O-Town.

However, in a delicious moment, one of the band members took time out to introduce himself as Justin with absolutely no hint of irony. (Boy band, Britney, Justin? Maybe he just thought it was too easy.)

Finally, we obviously have to talk about Britney. This Philyist is not proud to have this basis for comparison, but having seen her in "concert" twice before, years ago in her heyday, Comeback Britney is sorely lacking. It wasn't as bad as her now-infamous VMA appearance—but it wasn't good. We're not sure if her dancing skills fell out with her two kids, or perhaps it was just the proximity to Justin Timberlake that gave her such great skills back in the day, and then K-Fed came along and shagged the two-step out of her, but it's just not the same. It used to be, you forked over a modest amount of money and sure, she didn't sing, but the show was amazing and she danced her ass off. Britney still looks great, but her performance at the Wachovia Center consisted of her skipping around the stage and busting the occasional, curiously awkward, move. Worse, her dancers brought it, making Britney look that much more wooden by comparison. Plus, hearing the Wachovia Center amp up the crowd before the show by playing hits from Janet Jackson and Madonna just made it worse, because you know Miss Jackson and Madonna could school Brit-Brit on putting on a fantastic, actually live, show. When tickets to your concert can run close to $500, you'd better step up your game and make it worth it. Sadly, Britney Spears did not.