Asshole of the Week

This column came about because, back in January, we read Bill Maher's "Dickheads of the Year;" the next day, we'd read a story about a couple of wastes of human life who had viciously beaten, stoned and hanged a Pit Bull in North Philadelphia. We were disgusted and appalled, and the "Dickheads of the Year" column was still fresh in our minds, and voila: we had our first Asshole dishonorees.

Well, either our first Assholes of the Week are still at large, or the city's just full of pieces of shit who like to torture animals. (Pardon our French, but this topic really gets us worked us because we love animals.) This week, a couple of juvenile delinquents worthless shitheads took a Pit Bull for a walk to the train tracks near Olney station, and then burned it alive.

It's tough to express in words how we feel reading stories like this one. We're major advocates for Pit Bulls because they've unfairly gotten a bad reputation. And the unsafe Pitties that are out there, are out there because there are human beings scumbags out there that torture them into aggression. Oh, the things that we want to happen to these guys. For now, we'd settle for them being caught and the city's new animal cruelty prosecutor nailing their asses to the wall. But what we really want, is for there to actually be a hell, and for them go there one day (along with our first-ever Assholes of the Week and the puppy-tossing Marine), and for them to get it as bad as they gave it.

Photo of a positively adorable Pit puppy by Flickr user Raleene.