Philadelphia is a funny town, and no, we don’t mean our wacky newscasters or our City Hall hijinks. We mean our comedy scene. It’s there, it’s good and it’s going strong!

Or so we thought...

OK, Comic Vs. Audience basically asked all of the questions we were going to ask, so we are forced to ask you questions about our other favorite subject, us! How excited are you to be interviewed by us, Phillyist.com?
I’m super-excited. Flabbergasted. Elated. Angry. I’m angry. Really mad. I can’t believe this has happened to me. I pay my taxes, I try to eat right, and this is the thanks I get. A Phillysit interview. What a cruel world!

If we were a tree what kind of tree would we be and would you make a dresser out of us?
You would be a birch tree. I would not make a dresser out of you because a) I don’t think birch makes for good furniture, and b) you’re friends, and I would have to kill you to make the dresser, and I don’t want you to die. I would, however, love to make a lamp, bowl, and several wallets out of Chip Chantry.

Why did you decide to do the SKETCHFEST now?
Things seemed to be reaching critical mass with Die Actor Die, Bedtime Stories, Philly Improv Theater. We wanted to strike while the iron was hot. The three of us had the feeling that if we waited for the perfect time to do PHILLY SKETCHFEST, we’d spend years waiting. No better time than the present. If everyone was onboard, we would get it together. And everyone was certainly onboard and excited to participate. Late May/early June seemed like a great time in terms of weather and availability, and we felt we’d have less competition in terms of theaters. We don’t like competition. Or criticism. Or racism. Or panhandling (not that we don’t like the poor, they are totally cool, we just find this word outdated).

In your CvA interview you said that the San Francisco Sketchfest didn’t book you because you were “funny, but too dirty and too East Coast.” Do you think you play dirty?
I like to trip people in races, and have been known to blow a tranq dart into the neck of an opposing teammate in flag football. So yes, I play dirty. As for Pierre’s stuff being dirty, I’d say yes and no. Some of our stuff is squeaky clean, some is filthy, and most is 85% clean and 15% raunchy. We try not to put limitations on our creativity. If we have a really funny idea, and it involves poop monsters, then we’re going to do it, even if people can’t stand the smell.

Do you think Philly has a dirty sense of humor?
People are making sweet sweet love in every city, suburb, and hamlet across the universe. Everyone has a dirty mind filled with dirty thoughts; it’s in our DNA. People in Philly are just more up front about it. We’re not one to pussyfoot around. Beat around the bush. If we have something on our minds, we say it. “Your breath stinks.” “That’s not what that word means.” "You can’t park there, Jackass.” “That tumor on your face looks malignant and you should have some tests run immediately.” There’s less of a filter in this town. Skip the pleasantries, get down to business. It’s a working class town, and we don’t have time for all that courtesy.

Do you think other cities take Philly seriously when it comes to comedy?
I think we’re below the radar at this point. It’s not so much that people don’t think we have a good comedy scene, it’s that they don’t know if we have one at all. A lot of stand-ups love to play Philly, and we draw the big names all the time. It’s the local heroes that need to get on the map. Which is what we’re joining you and other promoters in trying to accomplish. And we will, because there are dozens of hilarious performers in this town. People who make you laugh till it hurts.

Who is in the PHILLY SKETCHFEST?
PHILLY SKETCHFEST features Animosity Pierre, Bad Hair, Meg and Rob, Rowan and Hastings, Secret Pants, The Gentlemen’s Rotary Auxiliary, The Sixth Borough, and The Waitstaff. PSF is hosted by Helium favorite Chip Chantry, and includes a special performance by Boy Meets Tractor, winner of the Helium College Comedy Competition, sketch portion. A mix of talented veterans and feisty up-and-comers.

Alphabetical. Nice. What are you looking forward to at the festival?
I’m looking forward to making a lot of money.

Okay, actually, I’m looking forward to the finale show, all nine groups doing ten minutes each. The good vibes from all of those groups sharing one stage will be electric. I can’t wait for groups who’ve never met to see each other’s stuff and become friends. I think the excitement will be contagious, and the audience will catch it (unless they’ve been taking Airborne). And I’m looking forward to seeing the Waitstaff perform, since they are the only group in PSF that I’ve never seen live before.

Have you ever had our roast chicken?
Nope.

Too bad cause it is out of this world!!!
I love chicken. And roasting. Perhaps you could cook some for us and bring it to PSF. Lean protein is good for a sharp mind, and that makes for precise comedy.

Do you think we are in the midst of a comedy renaissance? If so, how do you see Philly’s comedy scene progressing? If not, why are you embarrassing us in our own article?
For Philly, this may be a comedy birth more than a rebirth. We’ve never had a real presence beyond stand-up in the city, but in the last few years improv and sketch and musical comedy have started to take roots. I see this scene growing and expanding until we have such a kitchen-sink array of acts that no one who lives here will need to venture beyond city limits to find what they need in comedy. Very soon, the media will take notice of this explosion, and then things will really get more explodyer. The pressure is building, and soon it will pop. People will start thinking of going to comedy shows as one of their best options for a fun Friday night in Philly. We’ll all become celebrities with money and SUVs and heroin and pet meerkats.

Proceeds from the show will go to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation. What made you choose them?
We wanted to make sure our charity was related to Philly directly. A friend of mine, who suffers from colitis, mentioned that the Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation of America has a Philadelphia chapter. I lost my aunt to Crohn’s in 2000, so I looked into it, and it was a perfect fit for PSF, especially with their charity walk being a week before the shows. We’ve raised $1700 for CCFA, something we’re all very proud of. We’ll be adding to that total with 10% of the ticket sales and all proceeds from raffles during the three shows.

What turns you on when you write? What is funny to you?
I like character-based skits. Comedy that arises from the things that make people tick. Matt loves throwaway lines that you think about later because they were so ridiculous. And Matt and I both love absurd situations. So combining all three gets our juices flowing. And we both gravitate toward things with a lot of energy to them. And a full story/character arc. And fart jokes. And poop jokes. And dick jokes. And combinations thereof.

Speaking of SF, they started out as a small festival that your manager Ben Maher worked on in the beginnings and now they are a major venue. Do you want to follow their model?
Yes, we are trying to follow their model. Ben has picked the brains of the San Francisco Sketchfest producers, who are all his close friends, and they’ve helped us a lot in avoiding certain pitfalls. They’ve given us a lot of ideas that they picked up along the way that we never would’ve thought of on our own. So, even though we’re new at this, we have some vicarious experience that has given us confidence. Thanks, SanFran SF producers!

Great, before we go, let’s do a blog check: What’s the best blog that covers the below and above from the City of Brotherly Love?
Phillyist.com! It’s like lying on the beach at night when you’re drunk!

PHILLY SKETCHFEST
The Painted Bride Art Center (230 Vine Street, Philadelphia)
Friday, June 6th 9:00 PM
Saturday, June 7th 8:00 and 10:30 PM
A lineup of groups can be found here.

Tickets are $15 (or $25 for combo tickets)
and can be purchased online or at the box
office the day of the show.

A portion of the proceeds from PHILLY SKETCHFEST
will benefit the Crohn’s & Colitis Foundation of America (CCFA).