Monday Manners: Seating Arrangements

Move toward the middle.
It seems that there are two typical layouts for theatres (both film and live): one long row of seats with aisles down either side, or one medium-length row of seats with aisles separating it on either side from two shorter rows of seats that run all the way over to the walls. No matter what the theatre layout, then, latecomers moving toward the middle of a row can be quite disruptive to everyone around them—including you. If you're going to a play with reserved seating, there's really nothing you can do about this. But if you're seeing a play or film during which the seating is general admission and you happen to arrive on the early side (and you don't have a legitimate need, like a small bladder or really long legs, for sitting on the aisle), move toward the center (if you're in a row of seats between two aisles) or end (if you're in a row of seats that terminates at a wall) of the row, to allow latecomers to seat themselves with as little fuss as possible. Your toes will thank you.

Don't reserve seats you don't legitimately need.
Maybe you really are waiting for three friends to join you, so the jacket, backpack, and shopping bag you placed on the one seat to your right and the two seats to your left, respectively, do belong there. For now. But if you're not waiting for anyone and it appears that the theatre might get crowded, you don't need to drape your jacket over the chair to your left and put your purse or backpack on the chair to your right. Choose one seat to sit in, put your jacket over the chair behind you, and put your other belongings on the floor beneath your seat or, if that makes you uncomfortable, keep them on your lap. If, ten minutes after the movie or play has started, the seat beside you is still vacant, then you can transfer your belongings to it—but don't grumble when a latecomer wants to sit there.

Get cozy.
We Americans are all about our personal space, even as our cities get increasingly more crowded. Just as we feel compelled not to use a urinal adjacent to one that's already occupied (for further elucidation on that subject, see this video), so too do we feel the need for a "buffer seat" when we go to movies and plays. When a theatre's not too packed, it's totally acceptable, if not expected, for you to make like you're taking a college midterm and leave a seat between you and your nearest neighbor. But if you're at a sold-out show, it's time to take a seat and make a new friend. Or take a seat and just politely ignore the person sitting two inches from you.

Don't get too cozy.
Between most theatre seats lays two to four inches of wood or plastic that, in their sadistic way, theatres refer to as armrests because, as they well know, in a crowded theatre, there's not much resting happening on them. (This is true of airplanes, as well.) Unless you're lucky enough to be seated on the aisle, the arm rest is located between you and the stranger seated beside you. In a perfect world, all the right-handed people would sit in one row and use their right-side armrests, and all the left-handed people would sit in another and use their left-side armrests. But because that could be considered discriminatory, and it would be quite difficult to coordinate anyway, that's not how things work—and so quite often, you'll find yourself jockeying for control of the armrest(s) you share with your neighbor(s). Don't be an asshole here. Unless you've got a broken arm, you don't need to make sure your entire forearm is properly supported, thereby completely blocking armrest access. Typically, if you just rest your elbow on the rest and lean your arm back toward your lap, you'll have enough support and so will your neighbor.

Respect the reservations.
As much as it sucks to arrive at a theatre and discover that your favorite seat, having been marked with a "reserved" sign, is unavailable to you, it doesn't mean you should buck authority and sit there anyway. Sometimes, the seat's been reserved for latecomers. Sometimes, it's reserved for members of the press. Sometimes, it's reserved for friends or family members of the actors or filmmakers. Sometimes, it's been reserved for the actors themselves, who are supposed to enter the stage from the audience—and you're the jerk who's screwed up their blocking. Whatever the reason for the reservation, there is a reason, so just go find another seat. Editor Jim and I have seen some people get into serious trouble at a movie screening for ignoring the signs—and they got into trouble with the same dudes who tell you that they'll prosecute you to the full extent of the law if you get caught taping the movie. We imagine they aren't much nicer—although they're probably less litigious—about the seats.

Read this.
Sure, it's mostly about audience behavior at live theatre, but it does address the issue of coming late and leaving early. Short version: try not to do it. And if you do do it, either by necessity or desire, try to do it in the most subtle way possible. Without stepping on anyone's toes, please?

Image Credit: Flickr user DeaPeaJay