Pop quiz: On your first day of high school, if you are a shy, gangly teenager whose only friend is a pudgy wannabe rapper, when you see some bloodthirsty upperclassmen stuffing the only kid dorkier than you into a locker, do you stand up for what's right or do you slink into the corners and thank god it's not you?

In Drillbit Taylor, young Wade (Nate Hartley) chooses the noble and stupid option #1. This lands himself and his best friend Ryan (Troy Gentile) on the shit list of malicious senior Filkins (Alex Frost). After striking up a reluctant friendship with Emmit (David Dorfman), the locker kid, the three boys decide to stop Filkins' relentless bullying with the ultimate of hired guns… The Butterscotch Stallion.

Bob "Drillbit" Taylor (Owen Wilson) is a homeless Army deserter who pretends to be a black-ops specialist when answering their ad for a bodyguard. In return for their pooled allowance money, he offers to teach them how to take Filkins out themselves. Meanwhile, Drillbit and his crew of homeless friends lay in wait to rob Wade's sprawling McMansion.

With such a ridiculous premise, one shouldn't be surprised that Drillbit Taylor delivers as an uneven, but occasionally amusing, teen comedy. Drillbit goes undercover at the boys' high school as a substitute teacher, intercepting potential beat-downs and training them to deliver physical and mental blows, all while romancing the English teacher in the break room. As Drillbit grows increasingly fond of the kids, his cohorts grow increasingly impatient with the delayed robbery. Shlocky hijinks interspersed with betrayal and redemption ensue.

Drillbit Taylor should be judged lightly, but because of the involvement of Judd Apatow (producer) and Seth Rogen (co-writer), it cannot avoid comparisons to the widely lauded and far superior Superbad. As such, Drillbit Taylor plays like the awkward freshman trying too hard against Superbad's cool upperclassman.

The plot chugs along slowly, puffed up with quick laughs and mild tension, but rarely stops to flesh out the roots of its momentum. Though it's possible to wag a similar finger toward Superbad on some of these points, what grounds that movie is that underneath the crass language and unbelievable antics is a real, relatable emotional core—the anxiousness for maturity and the separation fears between two long-time friends about to diverge paths. For all of Drillbit Taylor's feel-good messages about building confidence and not running away from challenges, its characters play like caricatures of the beloved kids in Superbad, without any of the richness or depth.

But of course, as I said, without Apatow and Rogen's involvement, Drillbit Taylor would have the luxury of being judged lightly. So on that note, might I point out that for all of its flaws, at least you get to see Owen Wilson's naked backside not once, but twice! And that, I think, makes it all worth it.

Image courtesy of Paramount Studios.