On the Scene at the Phillies Rally

I don't know if you've heard, but supposedly our baseball team is going to the playoffs or something? Anyway, you probably don't care, but they did have a rally outside City Hall on Monday and Phillyist was there to take some "award-winning" photographs. Enjoy and get ready for the Phillies to start kicking Rockie ass today!

The rally was going really well. But then some gigantic, mutated version of the Philly Phanatic came out of nowhere and tried to dismember this unsuspecting dude in the gray shirt. I'd say I was scared, but it actually kind of ruled!

Beasley Reece and Ukee Washington were on hand to record the whole thing for Channel 3. Unfortunately, so was some chick with a rickshaw hat and a wacky red afro. Down in front!

Here is the Phillies' bus, just moments before Uncle Chollie and the Phils' players and coaches climbed out of it. I thought the police were there to reroute traffic and protect the players. Nah, a couple were actually trying to get a tryout for Adam Eaton's spot in the rotation.

Modell's was actually in the house to present a special jersey to Antonio Alfonseca. Unfortunately, it wasn't big enough so they elected to send it to Vincent D'Onofrio of Law & Order: Criminal Intent instead. Word is it was a little tight. Come on, dude, you're a great actor and all, but how about a salad?

The Phillies' PR shill Scott Palmer castigates the crowd for having too much fun at the gathering. Evidently, he was converted at the last minute by a Daily News editorial proposing that all fun be ruled illegal while there are people being shot within city limits. The crowd voted to not take Daily News editorials seriously until they can read a baseball box score without being mistaken for a sexually-crazed pervert.

An idyllic early fall day outside of Philadelphia's beautiful Dilworth Plaza as the rally wraps up...at least until the massive, mutated Philly Phanatic returned to turn the whole scene into a massive, gory sinkhole.

All photos by author