Enlightenment Through Unawareness

Unfortunately, our control group for self-unawareness is surrounded by unintelligent troglodytes who have no idea what self-awareness is. Indeed, Hilton and Richie formerly knocked boots around Los Angeles together, partying, lounging, embarrassing themselves, and (apparently) driving drunk with a key halfway into a plastic bag full of coke. Lindsay Lohan has been linked to Hilton and Richie as well – not to mention Britney Spears. Michael Vick has been surrounded by the worst of the worst his entire career. His relatives and friends saw him as a gold mine and they took advantage accordingly. His lack of self-awareness has come back and latched its pit bull teeth into the bottom side of his ass. Instead of surrounding himself with individuals who said, "Mr. Mexico, you ought not buy and breed those dogs for fighting. You're a pretty high-profile dude; I don’t think this will bode well for your image," he has surrounded himself with leeching family members and friends with the intelligence quotient of Barney Fife.

Self-awareness is constituted by individuals' notions that they exist, that others exist (with a similar self-awareness), and that their actions are viewed on a larger scale by those who are similarly (or more) self-aware. Self-awareness is honed and enhanced by surrounding yourself with (more) self-aware humans. The four subjects of this column do not possess any of these characteristics.

Somehow, though, these are the people responsible for entertaining us.

Many think that universal health care, gun control, and abortion are the major issues facing America; I think that the largest problem facing America (and Americans) is that our popular culture is (almost) wholly driven by a gang of buffoons who lack the necessary self-awareness to realize that getting tanked, then driving a Mercedes 100mph while dipping your beach house key into a gram of Columbian blow, is not a good idea for either their well-being or their image. The same can be said for Vick, whose offense is breeding pit-bulls to rip each others' faces off with their own teeth.

Is that precisely what attracts us to popular culture?

Or, is it shared experience?

In Killing Yourself to Live, Chuck Klosterman says, "Every day, shows like Access Hollywood force two million housewives to ask themselves, 'Who really cares who Lindsay Lohan is dating?' … Almost no one. There are very few Americans who honestly care who Lindsay Lohan is dating. But it's still information they need to have. This is because those people care about something else entirely; they’re worried about the possibility of everyone else understanding something that they’re missing. This is what they're afraid of, and this is how they deduce societal truth."

Oddly, Lindsay Lohan is the token example in both cases. It’s undeniable that Lindsay Lohan's love life and driving record are not pressing public issues. No one truly cares. But, as Klosterman explains, if you didn't know this stuff you'd be missing out or behind the curve. A friend of mine replied to an e-mail I sent the morning after 'La Lohan' (as she called her) was pulled over, explaining that that is what she had to deal with for the day (she works at a news network). Outside of that being her day's task, that's information that is inconsequential to me in any form. However, by mentioning it she was both informing me she was in the know and, as a result, putting me in the know. Within the confines of popular culture, we have a social responsibility to inform others of the social irresponsibility of varying persons of greater notoriety.

This is what draws Americans to popular culture. In order to feel like you’re getting your fair slice of American Pie, you must be feeling, thinking, reading, eating, and drinking the same things as everyone else. Popular culture is the only venue where shared experience still exists. The celebrities are the same when they're not on the silver screen. They're just 'famous people' who live like you and me. Their trials and tribulations are much more exiting to hear about than Billy Joe’s down the street. Moreover, no one knows who Billy Joe down the street even is.

In society, generally, we've lost shared experience. Everything has variety and I suppose that's a good thing; somewhere, though, it infringes upon feeling American. Look at all of the advertisements with which you’re bombarded – they are all offering a different product every time, and most times they're offering you a different variety of the same product type. Unless you play Fantasy Football, follow popular culture, or drive a hybrid, you’re missing out on the shared experience that is America. This is why popular culture is so polarizing in America. We have been fattened to the teeth with so much variety, so many new products (and the development of plenty of old products that are to become newer products) that we no longer share any of that in common with our next door neighbor.

Maybe that is the problem and maybe there is no solution.

Until something else trumps popular culture as America's unifying quality, we're doomed to read and learn about boozed up coke hounds fighting to the death in Ron Mexico’s back-alley dog pit and we all share a social obligation to pass that information onto anyone who may not want to know.

All of these things could be worse, though: Michael Vick could be the Eagles starting quarterback and the three amigas could have been driving on the Schuylkill key deep in blow.

It's the small things in life that make us love this brotherly-loving city!