This Week in Celebrity...

...Sensitivity: Alec Baldwin needs to maybe get over himself. Just a little. (Via What Would Tyler Durden Do?)

...Health: This must have been the most interesting day on-set ever. (Via Yahoo!)

...Moving Violations: Oh, Britney! (Via People.)

...Comebacks: She's back, and scantily-clad as ever! (Via The Superficial.)

...Shocking! Wait, reality TV doesn't convey reality? What? (Via What Would Tyler Durden Do?)

...Paternity: Tests are the new black. (Via E! Online.)

...Homecomings: We somehow feel that this isn't the last we've heard of this story... (Via TMZ.)

...Scandal: Ummm... She owns the stuff, doesn't she? What's the problem? (Via Times Online.)

...Surprise: Well, wouldn't you? (Via MSNBC.)

...Splits: That noise you just heard? It's the sound of a million teenagers' erections weeping. (Via Yahoo!)

...Assault: Most. Awesome. Assault. Ever. (Via The Superficial.)

...Stalkers: People make so much sense, sometimes. (Via What Would Tyler Durden Do?)

...Maternity: Ummm... Say what? (Via E! Online.)

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