Philly Jobs...and PhillyJobs

paperclips.jpgAs a temporary employee in Center City, my workplace fate is ever-changing. I drift from one job to another as the needs of my employer's client dictate. Yes, I am also seeking employment of a more permanent nature on my own time, but PhillyJobs is a vast and difficult web of insurance scams, pyramid schemes and the occasional legitimate opportunity. This is due to the fact that the site is part of the Beyond.com network and uses their proprietary software to provide job results in the Philadelphia central and metropolitan areas.

Since I'm just so damn busy (read: bored) at my current assignment, I thought I'd send them a little business plan of my own that might help out everyone involved. Because I had nothing better to do. And, okay, because I'm broke.

I have written a letter, which I will mail today, and which comprises the second half of this here post-a-licious article.

Trust me, make the jump...

The body of the letter, with which I included my resume, follows in its entirety:

Dear PhillyJobs,

I am a 23-year-old graduate of Saint Joseph’s University with a BA in English. I currently live in Center City, Philadelphia. Recently, I signed up for your web site and I have been perusing the job listings for about an hour now, using various search terms and combinations. However, I was frustrated by the amount of bogus, pyramid-scheme types of jobs that my searches turned up, regardless of my tedious wording and rewording. It dawned on me that I have nothing to lose (except a stamp) in contacting you regarding an idea I have.

I understand that many of your listings are automated and retrieved from various databases, then pared down to jobs local to the Philadelphia and Greater Metropolitan areas. Indeed, I have read the page of testimonials linked to on the bottom of your PhillyJobs.com web site. However, the majority of those testimonials do not even originate in Pennsylvania, let alone Philadelphia. This may be a mere coincidence, but I suspect that it may be because I am not the only one who has had some trouble finding the less dubious job opportunities listed on the site.

Therefore, I propose that, for a reasonable hourly wage, you allow me to assist you in the quality control and assurance of these otherwise automated results.

The bottom line is that any decent employment opportunities that may appear on the results page are difficult to weed out from the mire of "Nationwide" scams. My proposal is merely for a part-time, 20 hours/wk maximum, telecommuting position as an auditor of your listings, with the goal of ensuring that PhillyJobs.com consistently provides relevant, trustworthy and lucrative opportunities to its users and successfully connects legitimate employers with the potential applicants they need.

I understand that the likelihood of your accepting my proposal is essentially nonexistent, but I would like to thank whomever it is that has at least read this far for their time and consideration. I have, in a fit of blind confidence, included a copy of my resume. Regardless of your response to this proposal, please take these issues into consideration for the benefit of the employers and job seekers who use your site on a daily basis.

Sincerely,

Joseph Ross

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