This Week in Celebrity...

...Assault: Not only don't we want to be on the road when she's driving, now we don't even want to be on the sidewalks! (Via The Superficial.)

...Drunkenness: Imagine her poor seatmate if she had been allowed to board! (Via What Would Tyler Durden Do?)

...Whoops: When travelling abroad with items of questionable legality, you might want to find out just how questionable they are. (Via Yahoo!)

...Maternity: Seriously? How is this even possible? (Via The Phoenix New Times.)

...May/December: We love Jude Law and all, but she's young enough to be his daughter. (Via The New York Post.)

...Shockers: Yeah, it's about that time again. (Via Us Weekly.)

...Vanity: Maybe she just thinks they're mirrors? (Via MSNBC.)

...Assault, Part 2: Did he have a joint on him at the time? (Via What Would Tyler Durden Do?)

Video embedded above is a clip of a comedy routine by Richard Jeni, who passed away this week in an apparent suicide. He was a funny guy, and he will be missed.