This Week in Celebrity...

...Unavailability: Cheer up, ladies. There are still other fish in the sea! (Via MSNBC.)

...Science: Because clearly a baby's paternity can be determined through her mother's DNA. (Via Playfuls.)

...Addiction: It's Robbie Williams' (remember him?) turn to go to rehab. (Via Yahoo!)

...Weird: We know about the cure because of that episode of Friends, but it's certainly not red carpet behavior. (Via Just Jared.)

...Modesty: Britney Spears has got it in spades. (Via Egotastic!)

...Oops: Looks like another member of 'N Sync is about to be "Lanced." (Via dlisted.)

...Ummm: Except for that part where dancing typically requires two legs, this sounds like a great idea! (Via People.)

...Bikinis: Everyone's abuzz about Beyonce's SI cover. (Via What Would Tyler Durden Do?)

...Michael Jackson Wannabes: It's the video that supposedly broke up JT and Cameron Diaz, and it's LONG (and embedded above). (Via various sources; located on YouTube.)

...Hawtt: Who doesn't want a chihuahua to fall in love with him? (Via Hollywood Rag.)

...It Doesn't Matter If She's Dead: This is still one of the most disgusting things we've ever heard. (Via The Superficial.)

...Paternity: Out of all the strange details in this post, quite possibly the strangest is the age difference. (Via Yahoo!)