This Week in Celebrity...

...Dirty Little Secrets: Nothing surprising about this list. (Via What Would Tyler Durden Do?)

...Illegal Things Gotten Away With Because of Fame: That's not oregano. (Via The Daily Mail.)

...Cosmetic Surgery: Well, at least Tara Reid will admit that she had it. (Via The Superficial.)

...Malibu Ghettos: This is now officially our favorite thing ever. (On YouTube, via Columnist Katie, who got it from reader Anna.)

...Reunions: Paris and Nicole don't want to be on Survivor. (Via ABC News.)

...Stupid: Jessica Simpson doesn't have a clue. (Via MSNBC.)

...Suckitude: Must have been nice to know that the last project of your life sucked. At least you know who to blame. (Via The Post Chronicle.)

...Bitchiness: Sienna Miller has insulted the state of Pennsylvania and must pay. (Via Pittsburgh Live.)

...Violence That We Wish Was Real: Oh look! K-Fed getting punched! (Via The Superficial.)

...Fugly: Wow. Just...wow... (Via What Would Tyler Durden Do?)

...Ass-Kicking: See, if Ellen Pompeo and Katherine Heigel had been fighting, everyone would be calling it hot. We just call this slightly scary. (Via The Hi-Heeled Hotties.)

...Naked: And not in the good way. Not at all. (Via Mollygood.)

...Breakin' the Law: Kim Basinger will probably get the Martha Stewart treatment, so she doesn't get any pity here. (Via People.)