This Week in Celebrity...

...Irony: TomKat finally had their baby this week. Just down the hall from Brooke Shields, who was delivering the same day. We're sure there was much witty reparte amongst hospital staffers. No word yet on whether Cruise ate the placenta. (Via People.)

...Makeovers: Brad Pitt has taken a fashion cue from his four-year-old stepson, and it's not pretty. But hey -- at least his socks probably match! (Via The Superficial.)

...Censorship: What Would Tyler Durden Do? has the scoop on the "controversial" "Family Guy" episode of South Park. (Via What Would Tyler Durden Do?)

...Eww: David Spade and Heather Locklear are an item. But hey, if he could get Rebecca Romijn in fiction, why not? (Via The Superficial.)

...Not-Skank: Teri Hatcher does not have sex with men in a van parked in front of her house. But it sounds like a great DH plotline! (Via Yahoo!.)

...Baby Watch: With Katie and Brooke's kids born this week, Gwynneth's last week, and Angelina's any day, we need a new pregnant celebrity, stat. Enter Tammy Lynn Michaels, actress, partner to Melissa Etheridge, and bitchy cheerleader supreme (in the now-defunct Popular), who is pregnant with twins. The father is not David Crosby; they went the anonymous route this time. (Via The Deadbolt.)

...Terrible Puns: We told you about TomKat's baby above, but we had to throw this link in because of the last line of the article. Ten points if you get the reference! (Via E! Online.)

Image: Sim-rendering of Baby TomKat, courtesy of TomKat Crazy.